If you throw your peas in the sky you get air pods.
I eat a ton of corn everyday.
I guess that makes me a cornivore.
They say that the local baker is the breadwinner of his family. True enough.
What type of person doesn’t like pizza?
A weir-dough.
I tried wild ox milk
Turns out I'm yak-tose intolerant
What happens when no one comes to your birthday party?
You can have your cake and eat it too.
My wife's been on a banana diet.
She hasn't lost any weight, but you should see her climb trees now!
Why did the orange stop rolling down the hill? It ran out of juice.
"I'm not a wino. I'm a wineYES!"
I really like corn, but I can't find it because this time of year it's never in stalk
Fish taco says why don't you want to taco about it And the nacho says cause I'm nacho friend.
There’s a great new rock and roll cover artist doing the rounds at the moment – his name is Chuck Cherry.
Whats green and smells like bacon? Kermit the Frog's finger! Why do we cook bacon and bake cookies?
What do you call a pickle doctor?
A dill pusher.
I used to work at a nut farm
The work conditions were great but the salary was peanuts
What do you do when your partner drinks your coffee? I don't know, but that's certainly grounds for divorce.
What do they serve at birthday parties in heaven?
Angel food cake, of course!
Why did the kid keep falling off his bike? It had a banana seat.
What did the orange do the night before the exam?
He put his nose to the “g-rind-stone” and read the entire textbook.
Why doesn’t anyone like to hang out with crackers?
Someone always cuts the cheese.
If you put your ear up to a Taco Shell
You can hear the Sí.
Why did the elephant cross the road?
To get to the peanut.
What did the daddy potato say to his son before his soccer game? I’m rooting for you!
What did the artichoke say to the man eating a salad? Have a heart.
My doctor told me to cut down on red meat.
So, could you brown it up a bit?
What do you call bananas who are friends with monkeys? A bunch of idiots.
What do you call a sleeping pizza?
A piZZZZZZa.
Why did the burglar break into the bakery? A; Because he heard the cakes were rich.
What did the skeleton order for lunch? Spare ribs!
Q: What’s red and goes up and down, up and down?
A: A cherry in a lift.
I tried looking up ice cream puns on the Internet...
But then my browser froze.
What kind of cheese protects a castle?
Moat-zarella.
What do you say happened to an onion who got what it deserved? You say it got karma-lized.
If you bake an oatmeal raisin cookie at a temperature of 666 degrees, what do you call it? Raisin hell!
What’s a nut’s favorite scary movie?
The Creature from the Black Legume.
Why did the orange go to the doctor? He wasn’t peeling well.
What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef!
Why doesn’t the squirrel accept cash or credit at his store? Because it only accepts cash.
Some people say popcorn is hard to chew. There’s a kernel of truth to that.
Why was the sweet potato too shy to ask out the russet potato? Because he was a real spud.
What did the steak say to his girlfriend? You're the apple of my rib-eye!
What did the peanut say right before taking an exam? “I walnut fail!”
What's the manliest fruit to eat?
Mango.
What do you call an edible ion?
An onion
Did you know milk is the fastest liquid in existence? It’s pasteurized before you ever notice.
Those people are preparing peach gelato because they want to demonstrate their rights to freeze peach!
No one laughed at my soup puns. I said "When I crack a soup joke, everyone is soup-posed to laugh".
Our daughter eats her corn one kernel at a time.
She's a unicorn.
I've just been to court accused of sniffing the skins of vegetables and fruits.
I got off on a peel.
When you cross a train engine with a strawberry tart, you make a puff pastry.
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