I tried finding the dairy factory last night, but I had no luck. I must have lost my whey.
There's no need to cherry your feelings, I know you love me really.
What did the orange say to the lemon?
"'yello!"
Cows don’t make very good cops. They refuse to go on steak outs.
What's in a honeymoon salad?
Lettuce alone
Did you hear about the love affair between sugar and cream? It was icing on the cake.
What kind of cookies do poor people want during Halloween? Fortune cookies.
How do astronauts eat their ice cream? In floats!
I mashed a few mangoes, pineapples, melons, strawberries, and grapes into a pot. Served the mash to guests visiting my place.
Called the dish, Mea Pulpa.
What do we call a scientist who specializes in pineapples? He might be called a pineappleologist!
My wife asked me why I bought a pear tree.
I told her "what, you told me to grow a pear."
What do you call pears with no ears?
Deaf.
When do bakers stop making donuts?
When they get tired of the hole thing.
And what should every barista say to their customers? Have a brew-tiful day.
Why did the hummus blush?
Because it saw a chickpea!
My favorite fruit is the pear.
Because if you have two and you eat one, you still have a pear left.
I hear Jake finally broke up with his crazy grocer girlfriend; never could tell water problem was.
What do you call a rapper working at Cold Stone? Scoop Dogg.
Why did the baker quit making donuts?
Because he was fed up with the hole business!
I got a pear stuck in my toilet. All I needed to do was flush and it was gone.
Because a flush always beats a pair.
What did the cheese say when it looked in the mirror ? Halloumi (Hello me)
What do sophisticated fish drink? Salt-Tea.
What do you get when you divide the circumference of a watermelon by it’s diameter? Watermelon PI.
Why don't the Maple Leafs drink tea? Because the Canadiens and Red Wings have all the cups.
"Let's get fizzical. Pass the prosecco."
What do you call a cherry that is hard as nails? Tough as old fruits.
What do oranges have after a hard work out? Juice!
What does the ginger bread man put on his bed? A cookie sheet.
When you cross a train engine with a strawberry tart, you make a puff pastry.
Did you hear about the farmer who sold his sheep to slaughter because he wasn't making enough money from the wool? The situation went from baa-d to wurst!
Why did the orange become juice?
It couldn't handle the pressure.
How do you make a mango shake?
You take it to a scary movie.
I recently heard on the news that due to newly detected fungus infection in the onions, the government was recalling all the recent packages of the vegetables. Despite being a farmer, I had no tears to shed over this.
What does the watermelon say to its girlfriend on Valentine’s Day? – “You are one in a melon!”
I spent last Christmas with a bunch of soft fruit. I kept getting confused with the toast – they were saying “Eat, drink and be cherry!”
What group of cheese has been known to fly? Curds of prey!
This joke is like the time I slipped and fell into a salad.
Corny on the Cobb.
Apple and orange were the only two left that evening. Everyone else had dates.
Q: Why did no one like peach’s personality?
A: Because it had a heart of stone.
Don't be too harsh on the bread. All it kneads is love.
What’s the difference between a delivery driver and the pizza they deliver?
The pizza can feed a family of four.
What do they serve at birthday parties in heaven? Angel food cake, of course!
Did you hear about the salad race the other day?
The Lettuce was ahead, but the Tomato was ketchoping up...
I asked the pianist if he could play the Chick Pea Song.
He said, "Maybe. Can you hummus a few bars?'
I introduced chocolate to milk. They did a chocolate milk shake.
What’s the best thing about being a butcher? You get to meat the best people.
What do oranges like to listen to?
Musical com-peel-ations.
I was caught smuggling a taco into the new star wars movie...
...they now call me Rogue Juan
What do you call a piece of cheese that likes to shoot hoops? Swiss!
Have you guys tried kangaroo beer?
It’s a little hoppy.
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