Why did the Iron Chef have to stop cooking? He ran out of Thyme.
What's a coffee's favorite karaoke song? Hit Me With your Best Shot.
What do you call a very tall cherry blossom tree in Italy? The leaning flower of Pisa.
I was hoping my friend would catch the lemon-lime soda i tossed her.
But unfortunately Sierra Mist
I gave my toddler peas for the first time. He wasn't very hap-pea.
What do you get from an Alaskan cow ? Ice Cream
What do chickens serve at birthday parties?
Coop-cakes!
Having chicken broth before the game was a sure shot way to maintain energy for the Soup-er Bowl.
What is a chillin' banana's favorite song?
Mellow Yellow!
What do you call two watermelons that are not allowed to get married? A couple of can’t- elopes.
When the orange started peeling, he was glad it was finally cutting some weight.
Can I have some of your avocado?
GUAC NO! I give zero guacs! You need to guac off!
When she asked me if I like soup, I replied saying "I am crazy pho soups".
Thank you for helping me. Biscuit’s the yeast I could do.
What cheese surrounds a medieval castle? Moatzeralla
Why are popsicles so snobby?
They have a stick up their butt.
I can't drink milk. I lactose genes required to digest it.
Where did the nut keep his money?
In his cash shoe.
Nobody wants to sit next to the watermelon in the class because it has a strange smelon.
What did the watermelon wife say to his stinky husband? You’ve got a strange smelon you today.
What did the deer say to each other when they were trying to solve a difficult problem? This is such a deer-lemma!
What did the Cheese salesman say? That cheese may be Gouda, but this one is Feta!
I think it’s funny when I ask girls whether they would spit or swallow my seed if I was a watermelon. Unfortunately, almost all of them reply not in a hundred melon years.
Strawberries are the most bullied of the fruits.
They're always getting picked on.
The police officer only had soups for dinner. He was a soup-erintendent.
What kind of nuts come in cans?
Creamed a-corn.
Who answers the door at the peanut mansion?
The peanut butler.
Why did the burglar break into the bakery? Because he heard the cakes were rich.
What did the priest say before he and his family ate their salad?
Lettuce pray.
What's the difference between French fries and orange juice?
You can make orange juice out of orange, but not French fries out of French
What do you get when you cross a pig and a centipede? Bacon and Legs.
How does a hen leave its house?
Through the eggs-it.
Cow's that eat strawberries give strawberry milk.
What do you call a cow that has 1 leg? Steak
Keep calm and carrot on.
What do you call a rapper working at Cold Stone? Scoop Dogg.
Tobacco companies have made an orange flavored cigarette?
“They call it “Nico-tang”
What sandwich spread makes people itch?
Flea-nut butter.
Why did the coffee bean keep checking his watch? Because he was pressed for time.
The worst type of criminal is he who mugs other people's coffee.
Three tomatoes are walkin' down the street.
Papa Tomato, Mama Tomato and Baby Tomato.
Baby Tomato starts lagging behind, and Papa Tomato gets really angry.
Goes back and squishes him and says: "Ketchup."
I caught the chef sticking his hand in the cooking pot. He looked at me and said...
"I was just feeling a little chili."
You can never make a crumble with just 3.14 strawberries because that would make a pi.
What is a cheese lover’s favorite track and field event?
The curdles.
I wasn’t sure if I ordered enough tacos from Taco Bell.
So I got a just in quesadilla.
What cheese cries the most?
Babybel.
What is the smallest onion known as? It is known as an electronion.
What is a pirate’s favorite cheese?
Ched-arrrrgh!
Why was the sweet potato too shy to ask out the russet potato? Because he was a real spud.
What is a walnut’s favorite Christmas play? The Nutcracker.
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