What do you call bacon with salt on it
Salt and Peppa
American cherries generally do pretty well at high school. Many of them end up on the cherryleading squad.
How is coffee better than a woman?
It goes down way easier.
I don’t want naan of that. Neither do I!
Why does the lettuce always win the bodybuilding competition?
Cuz it starts a head and is usually shredded.
Have you ever tried pineapple milk? Do you know where it comes from? Obviously from the pine – nipples!
A storefront that boasts a fruit pun, just peachy.
This is a taco and burrito conversation.
Nachos.
How do monkeys get down the stairs? They slide down the banana-ster!
What do you call someone who’s crazy about corn?
A corn-ivore!
What is the cherry fruit's favorite American talkshow? The Cherry Springer Show of course!
What kind of cheese makes the best music?
Brieoncé.
What's a barista's favorite exercise at the gym? The French press.
It peels nice to be voted in as the most appeeling model in the contest.
What do you do if you see a blue banana? Try to cheer it up.
We had made everything for the party and the groom came in, did a quick assessment and didn’t seem amused. “Orange you glad we did this?” we asked him.
I love you a tot!
What is the best part of Valentine’s day?
The day after, when all the chocolate goes on sale.
Where does a potato go to college? DeFry
Why did the hamburger dress up as a computer? Because he wanted to be a Big Mac.
On Valentine's Day, the peach said to his wife, "You will always have a peach of my heart!"
What do you call a self-obsessed egg?
An eggomaniac.
I replaced the milk in the carton with lemon juice. Everyone was really sour about it.
My banana grandad got in an accident last year, he bruised like a peach!
What did the coffee say to its date? Hey there, hot stuff.
What do you call a bee that makes a milk?
Boo-bee
Inviting cherries over for a drinks party is easy. Simply start your invitation with “You are cordially invited…”
So yesterday I saw a bottle of ketchup steal a bottle of mustard
'Twas saucepicious
Cherries go all out when they go to festivals. You’ll probably see loads of them, running around in pie-dyed shirts.
What kind of wine do traffic cops like best?
Fine wine!
Due to unusually successful harvests of chickpeas this year, the price of hummus is going to fall dramatically.
Buy the dip.
What do we get when we mix an iPhone and a Christmas tree? A pine – apple!
What do you call a pickle from the southern backwoods.
A hill-dilly.
How do you get a squirrel to be your friend?
Act like a nut.
The cashew called the peanut boring.
The peanut felt very unsalted.
I went to watch a play and there were so many peach errors in the dialogues.
How do little avocados get what they want?
They spread it on thick.
What was Valentine’s favorite dessert for the French cat?
Chocolate mousse
What type of keys does the gingerbread man unlock his door with? cook-keys!
Which Oiler great had a soft spot for Indian food? Jari Curry.
It’s too bad the man couldn’t quit his job at the bakery. He really kneaded the dough.
What did four of the last five presidents drink? Left-Tea.
What does a cat like to eat on his birthday? Mice cream and cake!
Why does it take a while before a peach leaves a fruit basket? They have to give a goodbye peach first.
A Blueberry asked a strawberry to go to hell.
That was berry rude of him
When do they smother a burrito in cheese? In best queso scenario.
What do you call a hobbit who has bad breath? He is known as Lord of Onion Rings!
Sometimes, all you need is to shake a few trees to find the perfect peach for you.
Why did the teapot get in trouble? Because he was Naught-Tea.
"You focaccia bag, crumb back and get it."
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