Q: What do vegetables wish for, more than anything else in the whole world?
A: Peas on earth!
Did you hear about the pea pod that became damaged?
It had to wear a pod cast.
I hate lentils but I love peas. They're more ap-peas-ing to my pealate.
My mum makes peas for every meal. I'm sick of her reci-peas.
Q: What do you call an angry pea?
A: Grum-pea!
What do you call two peas in a pod?
Peepee
What do you get with surprise peas?
Wet legs
My dad tried to put peas into an orange once. It didn't appeal to me.
Q: Did you hear about the pea that changed careers?
A: He went into a different field!
The difference between popcorn and pea soup, is that you can pop corn, but you can't pea soup.
Q: What made the green pea turn red?
A: It saw the salad dressing.
Q: Why were the two green pea plants so close?
A: They had deep roots.
What's the difference between black eyed peas and chickpeas?
Black eyed peas can sing a tune, chickpeas can only hummus one.
If you throw your peas in the sky you get air pods.