What do you call two peas in a pod?
Peepee
I made a pie with a can of peas in. Pea-can pie. It didn't taste how I imagined.
I gave my toddler peas for the first time. He wasn't very hap-pea.
Hundreds of chickpeas were found dead the other day. The police say it's a hummuside.
What did Mrs. Pea say to his wife after she refused to listen to her? "I don't care, just do as you peas."
Mr. Pea never did any work and yet always looked down on the other vegetables. He was a real peas of work.
Q: How do you make a blueberry?
A: You strangle a pea.
Did you hear about the pea pod that became damaged?
It had to wear a pod cast.
We're like three peas in a pod, but lately I feel left out. It's making me quite unhap-pea.
There was an announcement on the news the other day, we've finally achieved world peas.
Tonight my wife was making dinner and she was using some fresh peas. She dropped some on the floor.
My 4 year old said “mummy, you’ve pee’d on the floor”
Needless to say I was in stitches.
My mum makes peas for every meal. I'm sick of her reci-peas.
I asked the pianist if he could play the Chick Pea Song.
He said, "Maybe. Can you hummus a few bars?'
Some peas rolled off my plate, and one went far further than the rest. He was the cham-pea-on.
If you're in a food fight, always throw peas. We need to give peas a chance.
I just finished the Mona Lisa made from vegetables. It's a masterpeas.
I had a traumatic experience with peas. I even had to go to thera-pea.
If you throw your peas in the sky you get air pods.
My best friend said we're like two peas in a pod. I'm confused, there's only one P in pod.
I stopped eating pea soup. I gave it up for lentil.
Q: What made the green pea turn red?
A: It saw the salad dressing.
Q: Why wouldn’t the teacher bring the class to the green pea farm?
A: It was in a seedy part of town.
Hap-pea-ness is when you and your friend are like two peas in a pod.
Did you hear about the audio drama about peas?
It’s a pod-cast
To catch a polar bear you surround a hole in the ice with peas
Then, when he goes to take a pea you kick him in the ice hole.
I found my son sleeping in a pile of peas. May he rest in peas.
I know a pea that's a famous singer. He's a VIP.
I like fried chickpeas, but I shouldn't eat them. Every time I do I falafel.
The chickpea wrote a book, but he didn't release it until after his death. He wanted to do it post-hummusly.
Q: Why do peas dislike noisy eaters?
A: Because they want peas and quiet.
I lost one pea from my plate at dinner the other day. It was an escape-pea.
What do you get with surprise peas?
Wet legs
My sister's trying to get famous. She'll never make it, she's just a wanna-pea.
Lots of peas work as spies. Espea-onage is very common.
My mum made a chocolate bar out of peas. I asked if she could snap a peas off for me.
Me and my sister used to be like peas in a pod, but recently she's become too snap-pea.
If you want to ask someone to borrow their peas, you have to say pea-lease.
Q: What do you call two peas in a pod?
A: Peepee.
"I'll be right back, I need to go for a pea," said the fruit during the interval.
"Can I get some peas and quiet?!" shouted the pea dad angrily.
What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
Anybody can roast beef!
My wife won't let me become a bean farmer. Why won't she just let me work in peas!
What do you call chick peas in a cavern?
Humus Sapiens
I like to roll peas from the top of a mountain. I always start at the peak.
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