The Paddington bears don’t eat lots of marmalade sandwiches because they are already stuffed.
A lemon says to an orange, “What are you up to?”
The orange replies, “Not much. Just hanging ‘round.”
Why was red in awe of orange?
“Because orange blue green.”
The fruit bat ate the orange because of its appeal. It had such a nice color.
What happens when you rub two oranges together?
You get Pulp Friction.
Oranges rarely pass driving tests, this is because they keep on peeling out.
Why did the orange fall out of the tree?
It went out on a limb.
Why do oranges wear suntan lotion? They peel in the sun.
Q: Why did the orange cross the road?
A: Because everyone thought he was a chicken.
What happened when an orange, an apple, and a banana all went on a picnic together?
They had a “fruit-ful” day.
What did the oranges do after concluding the meeting?
They peeled the deal.
Why couldn’t the orange dance in the talent show without his partner?
Because it takes two to “tang-o.”
The next person that asks me for pineapple juice, cranberry juice, lemonade, and a slice of orange all in the same glass is gonna get a “punch.
What do you call fake oranges?
“Pulp Fiction”
What did the orange do the night before the exam?
He put his nose to the “g-rind-stone” and read the entire textbook.
I’ve got a great idea for an automatic orange peeling machine I hope it bares fruit.
What happened when the orange broke out of prison?
All heck broke juice.
Nowadays oranges have decided to go out with prune. The reason is that it is becoming so hard to find a date.
Why don’t oranges go around blind?
“Because they take Vitamin See!”
Why did the orange cry?
Someone hurt its peelings.
Why did the orange help the old lady cross the road?
To do a random act of rindness.
What would Santa’s name be if he wore orange instead of red?
Fanta Claus.
Why did the orange get insurance?
Zest in case.
Since her parents wanted to become wealthy fast, they ensured their daughter had an orange-d marriage.
Why did the lemon like the orange? He’s not from concentrate.
What did the apple teacher say to her student? Help me orange the chairs please!
The orange was really sad at the event because it had no peelings whatsoever for the desperate prune.
What is the healthiest fruit?
“An orange. It takes Vitamin See!”
Why did the citrus fruit join the military?
“Because it was a navel orange.”
What do you get when you cross an orange with a parrot? A carrot.
Q: What happens when two oranges collide?
A: They get en-tang-led!
Finally, the call came in and the orange was informed by the person on the other end of the line that the company had orange-d an interview for the following day.
What do you call a male orange?
Mangerine!
Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? It said concentrate.
What did the orange say before jumping into the juicer?
“The zest is yet to come!”
What did the orange say when a knife pierced it’s peel? Flesh wound.
Q: Why are orange and banana phones so popular these days?
A: They have appeal.
Why did the orange turn into orange juice?
It couldn’t handle the pressure.
I was throwing oranges at tropical birds. One of them caught one then said: “Toucan play that game”
The oranges hadn’t been peeling well for a week when they finally decided to seek medical attention.
Why was the orange feeling sad?
It lost its zest for life.
What can a whole orange do that half an orange can never do?
“Look round!”
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock Who’s there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn’t say banana?
Why did the orange get pulled over while driving?
He kept peeling out.
Hap-pea-ness is when you and your friend are like two peas in a pod.
Which Star Wars character was the orange cast for?
Emperor Pulpatine.
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you going to let me in?.
Why was the orange skeptical of everyone around him?
He was planted with a seed of doubt.
Why did the fruit bat eat the orange?
“Because it had appeal.”
What are the longest lasting relationships in the fruit world? Orange-d marriages.