Why did the thief steal a pig? Because he was a hamburglar.
Why did the butchers meating end soon? Because one of them started beef.
Lately my wife has been looking at me as if I'm a piece of meat....
And it wouldn't bother me, if she wasn't a vegan.
What would you call a steak that leaped off the table and ran away? Fast food, of course.
What do you get when you cross a chicken and a cow? Roost beef!
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!
What do you call a pig squished by sand? A ham sandwich.
There’s a suspicious email going around, with the subject line “Canned meat.” Don’t open it, it’s spam!
What did the boss pig say to the pig worker for not working fast enough? “chop chop slow pork”.
I have a friend who has been diagnosed with a phobia of sausages. She always fears the wurst.
Where do cows go to celebrate New Years Eve? To a meat ball!
What is the most affordable type of meat? Deer, it is always under a buck a pound.
What is the best way to cook alligator meat? With a croc pot!
I invited a turkey over for dinner. He was very late for dinner – when I asked him about it, he said he was busy getting dressed.
I met a chicken once; she was desperate to join a band. She even had her own drumsticks.
What’s the best pick up line for someone you meet in a steak restaurant? “Nice to meat you”, of course.”
What did the hamburger coach tell his team after they lost the first round? “You have to keep frying, you can’t give up”.
What did the burger meat say to the BBQ? “Is it meat you’re looking for?”
What do you call hot dogs in winter? Chilly dogs!
It’s not often that you find an eye anywhere but on the face. Cows, however, have a rib eye.”
Why was the burger sad? Because he had the blue cheese.
What do you call seasoned and dried robot meat?
Beep chirpy
What do you call a sausage that's been to the doctor? Cured meat!
Did you hear about the butcher that backed into the meat grinder?
He got a little behind in his work.
You know I always wanted to open my own sandwich shop. I would have all the meat and bread money could buy...
Problem was I was afraid something would go a rye
I love meat. I think going vegetarian would be a big missed steak.
What is a cow's favorite deli meat? Bull-ogna!
What did the deer say to each other when they were trying to solve a difficult problem? This is such a deer-lemma!
What do you call meat balls falling from the sky? A meat-ior shower.
As a butcher, let me advise you never to back up into the meat grinder. It will make you get a little behind in your work.
What do you call a pig that practices karate? A pork chop!”
Some types of meat like to play around a lot. These are generally the game types.
A con artist tried to convince me he could ejaculate deli meat
What a load of bologna.
No one likes sausage puns, they are the wurst!
My local restaurant recently lost out on an entire order of the best local beef. No one has herd what happened to it.
What did the steak say to his enemy? I have a T-bone to pick with you!
I met a girl in a vegetarian restaurant who said she recognized me, but I have literally never seen herbivore.
Pirates used to make a delicious snack for themselves by crossing pate with flowers. They called it “lily livered”.
Why was the burger sad after losing the race? Because the hotdog was the weiner.
What did the steak say when he came across his nemesis? Ah, we meat again!”
Pigs, when out in public, have to keep an eye on their valuables as they are vulnerable to pigpockets.
Which is a meat patty's least favourite day of the week? Fry-day!
Vegans really have a beef with meat.
What do butchers say after they meet someone new? “Mince to meat you.”
Why didn't the butcher cross the road? He didn't want to brisket!
What do you call a cow with a twitch? Beef jerky!
Digital burgers are nothing but processed meat.
What do you call a group of cows that are on top of a hill? High steaks.
What do you call a steak hurtling through space? A meat-ior!
What did the steak say to his girlfriend? You're the apple of my rib-eye!
Go to BabaMail
