How did the hotdog overcome his fear of ketchup? He mustered up the courage.
Eating no meat except fish is really bothersome.
I should stop being a Pesky-tarian.
What did the steak say to his enemy? I have a T-bone to pick with you!
Salami get this straight - you don't like meat puns?!
What do you call a group of butchers coming together? A meating.
Did you hear about the farmer who sold his sheep to slaughter because he wasn't making enough money from the wool? The situation went from baa-d to wurst!
I invited a turkey over for dinner. He was very late for dinner – when I asked him about it, he said he was busy getting dressed.
How do you defeat a meat-loving vampire? With a steak to the heart!
Have you ever tried kangaroo meat? I have. It was tasty, but it made me a bit jumpy.
Why did the butcher work overtime at the grocery store? To make ends meat!
Our local butcher had to go to the doctor the other day. He didn’t know what was wrong, but said that he was feeling offal.
You might be startled to see a hamburger working out in your local gym. Don’t worry, they’re just there because they want better buns.
My doctor told me to cut down on red meat.
So, could you brown it up a bit?
What do you call a pig that practices karate? A pork chop!”
The butcher’s life was at steak when the meat market caught fire.
What do you get when you cross a chicken and a cow? Roost beef!
I met a chicken once; she was desperate to join a band. She even had her own drumsticks.
What do you call seasoned and dried robot meat?
Beep chirpy
What type of relationships do hotdogs like to have? A frank relationship, they can’t stand lies.
Cows love music. In fact, they even have a favourite note: beef flat.
I love meat. I think going vegetarian would be a big missed steak.
No one likes sausage puns, they are the wurst!
What did the deer say to each other when they were trying to solve a difficult problem? This is such a deer-lemma!
What is a butcher’s favorite Elvis Presley song? Love Meat Tenders.
What do you call hot dogs in winter? Chilly dogs!
What's the most musical cut of chicken? The drumstick!
What do you call a sausage that's been to the doctor? Cured meat!
I met a girl in a vegetarian restaurant who said she recognized me, but I have literally never seen herbivore.
Cows don’t make very good cops. They refuse to go on steak outs.
What do you call meat balls falling from the sky? A meat-ior shower.
What did the judge say at the finale of the meat throwing competition? The steaks have never been higher!
My local restaurant recently lost out on an entire order of the best local beef. No one has herd what happened to it.
Why did the butchers meating end soon? Because one of them started beef.
What is a hair stylist's favorite steak? A flat iron!
I’m bacon you! Please stop with the meat puns!
What did the steak say to his girlfriend? You're the apple of my rib-eye!
You know I always wanted to open my own sandwich shop. I would have all the meat and bread money could buy...
Problem was I was afraid something would go a rye
Did you hear about the butcher that backed into the meat grinder?
He got a little behind in his work.
What did the burger meat say to the BBQ? “Is it meat you’re looking for?”
What is a snowman’s favorite type of burger? A chilli cheese burger with iceberg lettuce.
What became of the pig who got fired from his job? He became canned ham.
What's the name of the meatiest Knight of the Round Table? Sir Loin!
What cut of meat do you get from an extremely tired butcher?
A filet mid-yawn
Why did the hamburger dress up as a computer? Because he wanted to be a Big Mac.
All the contestants at the pig Olympics were very happy with their prizes. They each won pork medallions.
My friend was totally addicted to the cold meat section in our local supermarket. It got so bad, they had to quit cold turkey.
What did the boss pig say to the pig worker for not working fast enough? “chop chop slow pork”.
What do butchers say after they meet someone new? “Mince to meat you.”
Have you heard about the pig who killed his own farmer? He did it to save his bacon.
Pirates used to make a delicious snack for themselves by crossing pate with flowers. They called it “lily livered”.