What is the cherry fruit's favorite American talkshow? The Cherry Springer Show of course!
Why do farmers make terrible comedians?
Their jokes are corny!
Why did the cheese get in trouble?
It was up to no gouda.
What does the ginger bread man put on his bed? A cookie sheet.
The farmer went nuts because he was told it’s more profitable that way compared to other crops.
Why do hens lay eggs?
Because if they dropped them, they'd break.
Why is Mrs Mayo mad at Mr Ketchup?
She caught him watching the salad dressing again.
Digital burgers are nothing but processed meat.
What is a ghost pirate’s favorite kind of tea?
Boo tea!
What did mama bread say to her kids?
It’s way past your breadtime!
The reason he went smiling all the way to the jail is because the judge sentenced him to a life behind chocolate bars.
A man likes sending random stuff to his friends through the mail because he finds it funny.
This particular time the man takes some lettuce to the post office to ship to a friend from back home.
He tries to package it up but it won't fit unless he cuts it into smaller peices. He cuts it up and stuffs it in a large envelope, however he forgets to write out and attach a shipping label. He doesn't realize his mistake at the time and brings it to the counter to send.
The postal workers says: "You can't send a salad like that, it needs adressing".
How is coffee better than a woman?
It goes down way easier.
Did you hear about the cow that committed murder? It was in cow-ld blood! How dairy.
What’s the best thing about being a butcher? You get to meat the best people.
How does bread woo a lover?
With lots of flours.
We all know that monkeys of all species love bananas, however, there is one family that doesn’t really fancy them, the orang-utans.
It’s not often that you find an eye anywhere but on the face. Cows, however, have a rib eye.”
Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing!
Wine Lovers Rhyme: A friend of wine is a friend of mine!
When I was learning how to cook soups, my mum asked me to follow my instinct. She asked me to go with the pho.
Wine puns. They're always in pour taste.
What’s the only fruit that never gets lonely?
A pear.
Why did the banana go to the hostpital? Because it wasnt peeling very well
My banana grandad got in an accident last year, he bruised like a peach!
In a romantic date, Romeo says to Juliette “Baby! You are the pineapple of my eyes!”
This foundation is rock salad.
Where was the first donut cooked?
In Greece.
Why did the hipster burn his tongue? Because he ate his soup before it was cool.
What should you do if you drop a root vegetable face down?
Turnip over.
Why did the two slices of bread disappear in the middle of the night? They wanted to e-loaf together.
How did the pine propose to the apple? With a pineapple ring.
If a crocodile makes shoes, what can you make out of a banana?
Slippers!
Never tell a taco a secret
It will spill the beans
Q: How do you make a blueberry?
A: You strangle a pea.
When the peach lost her mother, it left a deep pit in her heart.
My love for you sprouts more and more everyday!
A major produce organization is reeling after multiple reports of tainted lettuce.
We may soon witness the falling of the Romaine Empire.
What did one cherry say to the other cherry? If you weren't so tasty we wouldn't be in this jam.
This Halloween I'm gourd out of my mind!
What do dogs like to drink? Kit-Tea.
What do red berries say during the season they love best? Cherry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
Why was the sweet potato too shy to ask out the russet potato? Because he was a real spud.
What do you call a frozen frankfurter? A Chili dog.
What do you call two pears?
A pair.
I hope for world peas.
Cherries go all out when they go to festivals. You’ll probably see loads of them, running around in pie-dyed shirts.
What do you get when your dog jumps into the fire pit? A hot dog.
What do you call a cow with a twitch? Beef jerky.
How many French eggs do you need?
One egg is un oeuf.
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