I am a huge fan of local cuisine, and cooking is my soup-er power!
Donut even think about taking another donut!
Why does bread looks so bad in photographs?
It’s just too grainy.
Why was the burger sad? Because he had the blue cheese.
What did the nut tell itself before crossing the finish line? “I pe-can do it!”
We all know that the New England Patriots have their soup in the Super Bowl.
If fish is a type of brain food, then dumb people probably love eating noodle soup.
Why did the one legged clown leave the cheese circus? Because he couldn't get his stilton.
If you're in a food fight, always throw peas. We need to give peas a chance.
Why did Mrs. Wine Grape run away from home?
She was tired of raisin a family.
Why do milking stools only have three legs? The cows keep the udder safe.
This pizza party is the perfect topping to a great summer.
In the last peach race, I put $30 peach way on two new racers.
An angry fruit yells at traffic in front of them
“Mango!”
Q: What made the green pea turn red?
A: It saw the salad dressing.
I replaced the milk in the carton with lemon juice. Everyone was really sour about it.
How do you know that beer makes you smarter?
Because it made bud wiser.
Why do pumpkins never quarrel? Because they have no stomach for fighting.
What do you call a chicken with a piece of lettuce in its eye? Chicken Caesar Salad
Strawberries are only made in the strawberry plant.
What do you call a cow that doesn’t produce any milk? A milk dud!
I went into the library and asked for pint of milk. The librarian said 'this is a library'. So i whispered 'I'd like a pint of milk please'.
Did you hear about the crab that went to the seafood disco? He pulled a muscle
Some peas rolled off my plate, and one went far further than the rest. He was the cham-pea-on.
What is an astronauts favorite chocolate? A marsbar!
Why’d the lettuce blush?
It saw the salad dressing.
When you cross an orange and a bunny, you will end up with a pip squeak.
Nowadays oranges have decided to go out with prune. The reason is that it is becoming so hard to find a date.
My wife won't let me become a bean farmer. Why won't she just let me work in peas!
The strawberry was scared of the cream. They were afraid it had gone bad.
How much does a corn flake weigh?
1 Kelloggram.
What do you tell a cheese going through a hard time?
Ricotta get through this.
What is a monster's favorite food? Ghoul scout cookies.
They asked how the watermelon farmer felt after winning the lottery; clever bugger said he felt like a melon bucks.
I found my son sleeping in a pile of peas. May he rest in peas.
Knock Knock
Who’s there Justin Justin who? Justin time to make the donuts!
Where were the first orange trees planted?
“In Orange County.”
Dog Joke: What do you call a Collie with a mango on it's back?
Mango Lassie.
What is a vampire's favorite fruit?
A blood orange.
Egg-Plant a kiss on me.
I have a beer snob friend with Photophobia. He hates natural light.
What do you get when you cross a bean and an onion?
Teargas.
Went to a German restaurant. The beer was fine,
But their sausage was the wurst!
What do you give a horse that has just won the Kentucky Derby? An Appletini.
Do librarians like white wine?
No, they like theirs well red!
You can never make a crumble with just 3.14 strawberries because that would make a pi.
I had one nutty nightmare last night, it gave me a kola sweat.
What do you get when you cross Ice, chocolate, a big strawberry, a giant pineapple, and cold milk? The worlds best Sundae!
Broccoli: I look like a tree. Walnut: I look like a brain. Mushroom: I look like an umbrella. Banan Can we change the topic?
I hate lentils but I love peas. They're more ap-peas-ing to my pealate.
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