Why did the Jack-O-Lantern go to the pumpkin patch?
Because he had holes in him.
Why are oranges the smartest fruit?
Because they are made to concentrate.
What does a nosey pepper do? Gets Jalapeno business.
Where do they make all the decisions on a dairy farm? At the city cow-ncil.
My friend mashed up some cherries on halloween and said they were blood. I was cherry-fied!
Bananas, for breakfast, are such an a-peeling choice.
Strawberries have berry good eyesight because they are packed with a lot of Vitamin See.
The tiny bag of flour got in trouble, so his mother sent him to bread early. He kneaded to be punished.
What did ketchup say while spotting his friend at the gym?
Mustard all of your strength!
What's the difference between Hummus and Humus?
"mmmm"
No one laughed at my soup puns. I said "When I crack a soup joke, everyone is soup-posed to laugh".
Maturity is typically most rapid in a low latitude, where women and pineapples most do thrive.
I tried finding the dairy factory last night, but I had no luck. I must have lost my whey.
Fake ramen noodles are also called the impasta.
The pot of coffee he just made is basically break fluid.
Why did the ice cream truck break down? Because of the Rocky Road.
Tobacco companies have made an orange flavored cigarette?
“They call it “Nico-tang”
Tea pun-packed poem for my mum's birthday card
It’s been oolong time since my mum was born,
About Six-tea years to date,
Chai as you might, you can’t possible list,
her cupious amazing traits
Her balanced demeanour
Her Kindness and (earl) grace,
rooibost sense of humour,
too many to name in this teany space,
to pekoe out just a few does not do her justice,
let’s not stir things up and cause more of a ruckus,
While this ode may be (chamo)miles away from a Maya Angelou,
It’s just an obnoxious way to say how very matcha I love you.
What is a DJs favorite vegetable?
A turnip.
How do you make a mango shake?
You take it to a scary movie.
Today, I am eating a bun filled with pineapple and ham for my dinner. That is Hawaii roll.
I’ve been told that I need to stop making puns about meat… But I just can’t stop cold turkey.
What do you call a fruity pop star? Katy Peary.
Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing!
What’s a potato’s least favorite dance? The Mash Potato.
“How was your day? ” “It was a total disas-tater”
How do you say “four avocados” in Spanish?
Um, avo-cuatro?
I like to roll peas from the top of a mountain. I always start at the peak.
Walnuts are hard to crack open. It can take several mi-nuts.
What would you call someone who cheats others while selling milk? A skim artist.
I really like corn, but I can't find it because this time of year it's never in stalk
Why do we put candles on top of a birthday cake?
Because it’s too hard to put them on the bottom!
"Will you accept this rosé?"
What do you call someone who chokes on their tea?
A cough-y drinker.
Why should you make a cherry pie for someone that you miss? Because absence bakes the heart grow fonder.
Don't use raw milk to make butter
It's not worth the whisk
The apple says to the pineapple “What? Go out with you tonight? It will not happen in a million years!” Since then, we have a crushed pineapple.
What do we get when we mix an iPhone and a Christmas tree? A pine – apple!
just witnessed a chicken try to pick up a piece of corn for 5 minutes,
ImPeck-able.
On my farm, an entire lot of onions had some allergic reactions that broke out in chives!
Did you hear about the secret guild of bakers? They say that they only trade recipes on a knead to know basis.
What do we call the period in between eating a peach? – It is called a pit stop.
The informant obtained their information by burying themselves in the ground, disguised with a crown and some rind. Police called him the pineapple plant.
What did the lemon juice say to the baking soda?
Ya basic!
Did you hear about the sign on the bakery that got everyone talking? It said “I knead dough to live.”
Join us for a slice of fun.
When I told my friend an onion pun, he started crying. I asked whether they were tears of happiness?
We failed to find the dog's bone because the owner berried it.
Q: Why couldn’t the orange believe that her friend had let her down?
A: This was because citrus-ted him!
What did the ice-cream say to the unhappy birthday cake? "What's eating you?"
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