What is a DJs favorite vegetable?
A turnip.
Where does Thor grow his vegetables?
In his Asgarden.
Which vegetable is most likely to be your friend?
The broccoli.
What do you call it when vegetables have siblings?
Pumpkin.
I always knock on the fridge before opening it.
Just in case there's a salad dressing.
I need to take this picture for my instayam
Why isn’t the tomato a vegetable?
It couldn’t catch up.
Too tired, I’m out of aspara-gas.
What is the executioner’s favorite vegetable?
A head of lettuce.
The veggie lover was a total stalk-er.
What did the vegetable say at the party?
Lettuce turnip the beet!
What do you call a pastor who wanders from town to town, looking for leafy green vegetables?
A romaine Catholic priest.
Trying to find a new place, I don’t need mushroom.
What is a vegetable's favourite part of the song?
When the beet drops!
What are a submissive's favorite vegetables?
Collared greens.
Did you hear about that show that tests the listening skills of vegetables?
Its tests the ears of its corn-testants.
Michelle Obama’s favorite vegetable? Barack-oli.
My brother turned into a vegetable.
I guess now he has fryngers and potatoes.
Everybody romaine calm.
What a spud muffin.
Time to celery-brate.
I'd tell you about a girl that eats nothing but vegetables,
but I'm sure you've herbivore.
I hope for world peas.
Have you heard the new song from the band that entirely consists of vegetables?
It’s a master peas.
A carrot went to a football game.
Wonder who it was rooting for.
I yam what I yam.
What do you call the Commander of a vegetable army?
A kernel.
I've got a really good vegetable pun.
I’d tell you but I’m worried you’d think it’s too corny.
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