A potato gave a gift to his girlfriend.She said, “Aww, why are you so sweet? ”He said, “It’s just the
way I yam.”
Did you hear about the potato that got its head chopped off? It was decap-potatoed.
What do you say to an angry 300-pound baked potato? Anything, just butter him up.
What do you call a spinning potato? A rotate-o.
When potato chips don’t sell fast enough, the maker knows it will soon be crunch time.
Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Ergo, I am a potato
What do you call a baby potato? Small fry.
Happy Birthday to my best spud….get it? ? Spud…bud? ?
Potato puns are a-peeling.
Boil ’em, mash ’em, stick ’em in a stew. Happy Birthday from me to you!
All potato puns are pomme de terrible.
Time fries when you’re having fun!
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
If we played hot potato I’d lose, because I’d never let you go.
What do potatoes become when they smoke weed?
Baked potatoes.
Have a s-mash-ing birthday!
What do you get when if you cross a potato and the terminator?
A termitator.
I like you a latke!
Why didn’t the mother potato want her daughter to marry the famous newscaster? Because he was a common-tater.
People order potatoes a lot because they look a-peeling on the menu.
Why did the potato wear socks?
To keep his pota-toes warm.
Why wouldn’t the reporter leave the mashed potatoes alone? He desperately wanted a scoop.
What do you call a potato that’s reluctant to jump into boiling water? A hesi-tater.
What is a potato’s favorite baseball team? The New York Yamkees
Why do potatoes make good detectives? Because they keep their eyes peeled.
What do you call a potato that smokes weed? A baked potato.
I yam always very happy to eat sweet potatoes.
What do you call a person who spends a lot of time sitting and staring at potatoes? A medi-tator.
I yam rooting for you my sweet potato and I won't mash your heart
What kind of potato do you want to take home to your parents? A sweet potato.
The sweet potato asked the other potato : “How are my eyes? ”
Where does a potato go to college? DeFry
Why don't potatoes go to parties?
They're scared of the Monster Mash.
“I can’t breathe” One potato said to the other. “What happened? ” The other said. The potato replied “I
feel I dropped my nose somewhere”
John, you have so much po(tato)tential!
What do you call a baby potato? Tater tots!
What is a potato’s life philosophy? I think, therefore I yam.
What’s a potatoes favorite horror movie? The Silence of the Yams.
What did the daddy potato say to his son before his soccer game? I’m rooting for you!
Tony, where do I even starch? I yam so happy we’re best spuds!
How does a potato win at Street Fighter? By mashing the kick button.
Who is a potato’s favorite author? Edgar Allen Poe-tato.
I love you a tot!
How do you know when a potato is in a bad mood? When they are acting salty
How do you know when a potato is high? When it looks baked!
“How are you? ” “Well, I yam fried”
You’re the tater to my tot. I miss you a lot!
What do you call a potato at a football game? A spec-tater.
What’s a potato’s favorite TV program? Starch Trek.
I met a girl that owned three french-fry factories. I was impressed but to her it was just small potatoes.
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