What do you call a sweet onion? Caramelized!
Onions are great at being psychologists as they let people cry their hearts out in front of them.
What do you call who has been electrocuted? You call it anion.
What do you call an onion that carries electromagnetic waves? A photonion.
When I proposed to my fiancee, she started crying. It must be because I proposed to her with an onion ring.
What is the similarity between my wallet and an onion? Whenever I open both of them, I cry.
What is the similarity between a superhero and an onion? They both have layers.
What is the only way one does not have to cry while cutting onions? They simply don't have to form emotional bonds with it.
What do you call a dog who only eats garlic and onions?
A dog with a bark worse than its bite.
Did you hear about the man chopping an onion with the Grim Reaper?
He was dicing with death
What do you call a communist onion? You call it a red onion.
At the bar mitzvah ceremony, the Jewish onion greeted his uncle by saying 'Shallot'.
The old and wise onion had once told me that life is similar to onions. Whenever we peel off our protective layers, we end up crying.
“Spring, salad, shallot, picked”, said a friend. He knows his onions.
What is the onion that laughs a lot and is small and white in color? It is a tickled onion.
My son ate daffodil bulbs instead of onions
But that's really serious! Is he in hospital?
Yes, he's still a bit yellow, but he should be coming out in the spring.
Did you hear what happened between the cook and the onion?
I think there was a fight. It got a little dicey and tears were shed.
How do you know the French Onion is Canadian?
Because the oignon est!
What do you say happened to an onion who got what it deserved? You say it got karma-lized.
During the battle between the two onion kings, one of them was on the back foot as it was leek-ing blood.
What do you call an onion that is very sick and has a high temperature? It is a boiling onion.
I used to sell loose onions
Until I got the sack
Why did the farmer decide not to buy an extra phone? It was because he already had one for onion rings.
While cutting the onions, my eyes were leek-ing tears
What happens when an onion burps at the most awkward time? It releases tear gas.
What is the favorite color of onions all around the world? Their favorite color is the o-neon.
When I told my friend an onion pun, he started crying. I asked whether they were tears of happiness?
What was the event of the onion family getting back together called as? A family reonion.
I was surprised at the number of onions needed for this dish- it calls for shallot of onions.
What happened when the onion tried to cross the bridge guarded by Gandalf? Gandalf shouted, "You shallot pass this bridge!"
I walked into the kitchen and saw my wife chopping onions which made me cry
Onions was a good dog
I don't know what happened, but the moment I brought the onion into the kitchen, everything got rejuvenated, and everything started feeling fresh! Guess this really is a spring onion.
Which is the fanciest onion? A cocktail onion.
My biology class was going on and on, and I was stuck in the middle of it. Well, you know, this is how it feels to be an on-i-on.
Onions are great gymnasts as they have the advantage of swinging on the onion rings.
The late actor Sir Sean Connery was a big fan of the onion because well, he usshed to love them shh-allot.
What do you call a hobbit who has bad breath? He is known as Lord of Onion Rings!
What is the name of the onion ring that cannot but be funny? It is a Funyon!
Why do onions have poor self-image?
Because people cry when they get onions naked.
Last year, when I went to Texas, I met this very polite and gentle onion. Its name was the Texas supa-sweet onion.
I was making a salad the other day, and I thought I heard a small red vegetable that was a bit like an onion whispering. Must have been a hoarse radish.
Where did the onion find his family history?
In the archives
What do you get when you cross a bean and an onion?
Teargas.
I recently read a book by an onion which had opened up on its life. Midway through the book, I started crying.
One day on the highway, I saw a packet of onions and cheese walking down the road. When I offered them a lift, they declined by saying that they were 'Walkers'.
What do you call an onion monk who is present everywhere? Ommnion!
My wife said that onions are the only vegetable that makes her cry
So I threw a pumpkin at her
What is the greeting that Korean onions tell each other when they meet in the streets? They say 'Onion-Haseyo'.
Where do you most often find onions having a drink? In the salad bar.
On my farm, an entire lot of onions had some allergic reactions that broke out in chives!
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