How do you know if milk is expired? The smell is dairy bad!
Why could I not imagine to have milk in the afternoon? Because it was beyond my wildest creams.
Where do astronauts buy their milk? From the milky way!!!
Cashier: Sir, would you like me to put your milk in a bag?
Dad: I would much rather keep it in the carton!
My cows are super confusing. I can’t milk heads or tails of them.
I went into the library and asked for pint of milk. The librarian said 'this is a library'. So i whispered 'I'd like a pint of milk please'.
Why did the cow fall down while being milked? Because the rug was pulled out from udder it.
What did the man say after his boss threw cheese, milk, and creamer in his face? How dairy!
So I asked Satan if he had any milk I could drink...
He told me "No whey in Hell!"
Did you know milk is the fastest liquid in existence? It’s pasteurized before you ever notice.
Why do workers at the dairy factory always need a charger? Their milk is stuck at 1%.
I'm not saying you're old, but if you were milk I'd sniff you first.
Have you heard about the movie that involved haunted dairy items? I believe it is called Paranormal Activia.
The thing about milk-inspired puns is you only reach 2% of their potential.
What do you call the greatest cheese to every live on the earth? Legen-dairy!
What do you call fraudulent milk? Cow-nterfeit.
I tried to milk my cow last night, but nothing I did seemed to work. It was an udder failure.
What do you call yogurt that is terrified of other dairy products? A cow-ard!
What would you call a dairy product that is horrible? “Udder bullshit.”
Astronauts can't open milk bottles in space. 'In space, no one can. Here, use cream'.
Milk aliens have landed. They said 'take me to your litre'.
Did you hear what happened to the girl who twisted her ankle in the cow’s pen? She was milking her injury!
I introduced chocolate to milk. They did a chocolate milk shake.
Why do milking stools only have three legs? The cows keep the udder safe.
I tried out a lactose free diet. I stopped because I couldn’t figure out how to milk the almonds.
I think I drank some expired milk. I just have a gut feeling.
Where do Russians get all of their milk from? Mos-cow!
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