What do you call two watermelons that are not allowed to get married? A couple of can’t- elopes.
Did you hear about the new watermelon powered cars set to come out next year? Yeah, it’s too bad you only get a water-melon the gallon.
They asked how the watermelon farmer felt after winning the lottery; clever bugger said he felt like a melon bucks.
If that’s the case, would it be wrong to say that the unfaithful watermelon had an illegitimate daughtermelon?
Why did one melon break up with the other melon?
“He didn’t know water problem was.”
What do you get when you divide the circumference of a watermelon by it’s diameter? Watermelon PI.
Did you hear about the watermelon who starred in a telanovella?
“It was melondramatic.”
What do you call a girl with no arms, no legs, sitting in a watermelon patch?
“Melanie! (melon-y)”
I always wondered why the watermelon loving librarian never touched any of the books; turns out she’d red them all.
Why did the cantaloupe jump into the pool?
“It wanted to be a watermelon.”
What do you call a watermelon that spends all day at the beauty spa? Must be a hottermmelon.
Why do watermelons take such a long time to make decisions?
“They’re always melon it over.”
How are a car and a bicycle similar?
“You can’t make watermelon juice out of either of them.”
And speaking of meloncholy, I heard that’s what you get when you cross a watermelon and broccoli.
What did the father cantaloupe say to his son?
“Watermelon! (Water-my-lawn)”
Do you know what you call the outside of a watermelon?
“Rind of.”
The watermelon thief was charged with robbery with violence, but the judge later changed that to a minor felony; or melony as he put it.
Did you hear about the elusive skating watermelon thief? Not really, the only description they got was a Caucasian melon wheels.
What did the watermelon wife say to his stinky husband? You’ve got a strange smelon you today.
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