I fed my wife some ground chick peas and she choked to death
The police are treating it as a hummuside.
What do a pregnancy test and hummus have in common?
They both require a chickpea.
My Ex Girlfriend stole my Hummus.
I told that chick, peace
Man wins award after he died eating appetizers at a Mediterranean restaurant
It was a Post-Hummus award.
Why did the hummus blush?
Because it saw a chickpea!
My girlfriend spilt hummus all over her...
Can't believe that chick pea'd herself.
Due to unusually successful harvests of chickpeas this year, the price of hummus is going to fall dramatically.
Buy the dip.
I asked the pianist if he could play the Chick Pea Song.
He said, "Maybe. Can you hummus a few bars?'
Where did Vegans come from?
Hummus Sapiens
What is the correct answer to Hummus?
A cow.
Did you get a side of hummus?
It's a hummuside.
Me: I think I'll take a dip in the pool.
Lifeguard: What ya got there?
Me: Hummus.
I can't get my wife to try Mediterranean food.
She doesn't like hummus, which is a naan-starter.
I was gonna make a joke about Mediterranean food...
But hummus have missed the mark, and now I falafel.
What is the charge for beating someone with a bottle of olive oil and a can of chick peas ?
Attempted Hummus-ide.
What did one hummus say to the other hummus
“Sabra.”
Ugh.. I ate too much hummus..
And now I filafel.
So I was standing in the grocery store comparing the prices of a couple packs of hummus when my roommate came up to me and suggest the off brand roasted red pepper kind to which I replied:
"Ya, I'm not really sure about that brand. They seem to be very hit and hummus for me."
He was not impressed.
What did the fans say to the band named after a famous chickpea spread?
Hummus a tune.
I'm going to start a hummus brand that comes in really difficult to open containers.
It's gonna be called 'hummus posta eat this'.
Predictive Text
It's the scurge of the hummus rice.
What did the hummus say to the pita bread when he got sick?
I falafel.
Grandma: Do you like Hummus? Me: I love Hummus....and I sometimes like to singus!
What's the difference between Hummus and Humus?
"mmmm"
I've been on a real hummus kick lately, so as I came home from work tonight, my sister says to me "You're always bringing home hummus now." To which I replied, "Hummus where the heart is!"
I saw a road sign the other day that said "Dip In Road"
I turned the corner and drove straight into a load of hummus