What do you call a talking kangaroo?
A quantum leap.
Kangaroos can grow up to six feet.
Most only grow two.
Why did the kangaroo hesitate?
He didn’t want to jump to a conclusion.
What do you get when you cross a kangaroo with an angry man? A kangryoo
What do you call an irate kangaroo?
A k-angry-oo.
Who has better beer: Rabbits or Kangaroos?
Kanagaroos. While they both do great with the hops, Kangaroos just have a little more kick!
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring.
What do you call 144 kangaroos in a box?
Gross.
What kind of music do sophisticated kangaroos listen to?
Hopera.
What do you call a kangaroo in Africa?
Lost.
What do you call a liquid kangaroo?
Marsoupial.
What does a kangaroo do when it gets Covid? Goes to the hop-spittle.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite candy?
Lollihops.
What animal jumps when it walks and sits when it stands?
A kangaroo.
The collective noun for kangaroos is a "troop". What is the collective noun for cars?
A Lot
What do you call twin baby kangaroos?
Roo-mMates!
How does a kangaroo pick his favorite baseball team?
He jumps on the bandwagon.
I went drinking with a bunch of kangaroos last night and they didn't buy me one drink all evening..
Talk about short arms long pockets...
What’s something a kangaroo has that no other animal has?
Baby kangaroos.
What do you call a kangaroo that asks for seconds on ramen?
A more-soupial
Kangaroo: [dials 9-1-1] I can’t find my kids!
9-1-1: Did you check your pockets?
Kangaroo: [pats pouch] Oh… nevermind.
Who would win in a fight between a kangaroo and a zebra?
The zebra. Because he has so many black belts.
What do you get when you mix an elephant and a kangaroo?
Big holes all over Australia.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a cow?
A kanga-moo.
What is a criminal group of kangaroos called?
A gangaroo.
What do you can a kangaroo covered in tape?
Hopscotch
How does a kangaroo win a gold medal?
In the long jump.
Did you know you can fit 30 bananas in a kangaroo’s pouch?
Also, I’m not allowed at the zoo anymore.
What do you call a kangaroo that’s exhausted from trespassing?
Out of bounds.
A spider, a snake, and a kangaroo walk into a bar…
It’s a normal day in Australia.
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo? Hop on!
Why are kangaroos good at brewing beer?
They have hops.
Why don’t kangaroos make good sailors?
Because they’re always jumping ship.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite year?
A leap year.
Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?
Because then the kids have to play indoors.
What do stylish kangaroos wear?
Jumpsuits.
How do sick kangaroos get better?
They have a hoperation.
What did the Australian cowboy charge for kangaroo rides?
A Buckaroo
What do you call a kangaroo DJ?
Disc joey.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite game?
Jump rope.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with an alien?
A Mars-upial.
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo?
“Hop on!”
What do you call it when a marsupial tricks you?
A kanga-ruse.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and a sheep?
A woolly good jumper.
Did you hear about the scared kangaroo?
Yeah, he was a bit jumpy.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
Have you guys tried kangaroo beer?
It’s a little hoppy.
What do drunk kangaroos play?
Hopscotch.
What do you call a kangaroo sanctuary?
A kazoo.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.