I was driving through the safari park when my sat nav said “bear left”. It was clearly a zebra.
Got a pet zebra, didn’t realise how hungry they are. He eats like a horse.
The zookeeper told me I wasn’t allowed to buy the animals so I asked why the zebra had a barcode.
What did the lollipop lady say to the zebra crossing?
'You're stripping me of a job.'
What do you call a cross between a donkey and a zebra?
Debra.
Who would win in a fight between a kangaroo and a zebra?
The zebra. Because he has so many black belts.
I saw a guy trying to cross a really busy street. Trying to be helpful, I said, “You know, there is a zebra crossing 50ft ahead.”
He said, “I hope he’s having a better luck than I am.”
My zebra is a rubbish ballet dancer. I think he’s got two left feet.
Why can't you trust zebras?
Because they're convicted horse felons.
I told a friend that I thought his pet zebra was a fake. He said, “Well spotted”.
What do you get if you cross a pelican and zebra? Two streets further away.
Zebras usually hold strong opinions. They are very black and white creatures.
A teacher asks the class to name six mammals that you might find in Africa. One of the pupils replies, “five zebras and a lion”.
What do zebras hold?
Ze boobs.
A Zebra said to a Lion “Let’s swap roles for a while."
The Lion said “ I’m game!”.
A chap sees a zebra sitting on a seat beside him in the cinema eating popcorn. He says “what are you doing here?” The zebra says, “well, I enjoyed the book”.
Zebras aren’t fans of colouring books. They don’t like having to stay between the lions.
Why do zebras have stripes?
Because they don't want to be spotted.
What side does the zebra have the most stripes on?
The outside.
How do you find zebra?
Look under zeshirt.
All these years of technological developments and I still haven’t seen a colour photo of a zebra.
Which color is a zebra's base color? The debate is endless, and there is no clear answer.
It both is and isn't a black-and-white issue.
Thought I saw a zebra in a field near my house recently, turned out to be a horse in his pyjamas.
Two male zebras in the Zoo started making rap-music.
They're called the Zbruhs.
A zebra is the safest place to cross the road. Unless you are actually a zebra.
Why did the lion cross the road? Because he saw a zebra-crossing...
Why is it so difficult to sell a toy zebra.
You can never find the barcode.
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