What is most gorillas' favorite book to study in English class at high school?
The Apes Of Wrath.
What do you call a gorilla who has been locked up in prison?
A kong-vict
Q. Which country was founded by wild gorillas?
A. The Banana Republic.
Q. Why doesn't a big gorilla have to flush the toilet?
A. He scares the sh*t out of it!
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite holiday?
A. Ape-ril Fools Day!
Q. What do you call gorillaS who just monkey around at the gym?
A. Buff-oons
What do you feed a 700 pound gorilla?
Just give him anything he wants and then run.
Why did the Buddhist gorilla get locked out of his monastery?
He forgot his monk-key
What did the banana do when it saw a gorilla? The banana split.
What do you get if you cross a talking parrot with a gorilla?
I am not sure but if he says something you better damn well listen.
What do you call a gorilla stuck in a ventilation shaft
A Duct-ape.
My friend, who's a geneticist and a rapper crossed a gorilla with an orang utan
That's his new mixed ape.
Did you hear about the gorilla that was from Vietnam?
He was a viet kong.
Where do apes like to cook their sausages?
On the gorilla.
Q. Why did the gorilla go to the barber?
A. He was concerned about his ape-pearance.
Why did the gorilla have to visit the vet?
He wasn't peeling well
Old gorillas never die, but they do go bananas.
Did you hear about the girl who put gorilla glue in her hair?
Her stupidity knew no bonds
What did the gorilla wear when he was cooking in the kitchen?
An ape-ron
What is the first thing that gorillas learn at kindergarten?
Apey Cee's?
A muslim woman wanted to adopt a gorilla. Her husband wouldn't allow it.
He said, that's haram, bae.
What do gorillas and orangutans wear in the kitchen?
Ape-rons.
What’s a gorilla’s favourite pop group? A: Bananarama!
Q. Where did the gorilla like to go sailing?
A. The Chimpan-Sea
Why did the advertising tycoons hire a bunch of apes?
They were running a gorilla marketing campaign.
Harambe wasn’t only one of the best gorillas I’ve ever met...
He was also a great ape.
What do you feed a 700 pound gorilla?
Just give him anything he wants and then run.
Q. Which US city holds the record for suicidal gorillas jumping off skyscrapers?
A. Fall-Adelphia.
What did the gorilla say after spending one month at te gym?
Geez, gain a little muscle mass, and everybody acuses you of steroids. As if eating too many bananas wasn't dopey enough!
What is a gorillas second favourite fruit to eat behind bananas?=
Ape-ricots
Have you heard about the gorilla who got a name change?
Peaches the gorilla escaped from the zoo, but when they got him back they had to change it because it turns out he had become an Ape Re-caught.
Q. What do you get if you cross a gorilla with a grizzly bear?
A. Fired from the zoo.
What's the best time of year to see gorillas in the wild? Ape-ril.
Q. Why was the lady baboon so atrracted to the big gorilla?
A. 'Cause he had s*x ape-peal.
Q. Why was the gorilla's jungle party so lame?
A. Because theyran out of chimps and dip.
Q. Which book makes virgin gorillas blush?
A. The Naked Ape.
What did the Gorilla say to his friend when he called him back on the phone?
You-Rang-a-Tang?
How do gorillas get down the stairs? They slide down the banana-ster!
Did you hear about the gorilla with a screw loose?
He needed to use a money wrench to tighten it.
Q. Why was the blonde disappointed after her visit to an apiary?
A. There weren't any gorillas there. DUH!
Did you hear about the 2 apes that kept fighting with each other?
It was gorilla warfare.
Q. What do you call an entertaining gorilla eating a banana?
A. Ape peeling.
A gorilla starts off his day by going to his car
When he gets to his car, he notices hes missing something. He walks back in his house, and asks his wife "Have you seen monkeys?"
Q. Where do gorillas get their gossip?
A. From the grapevine.
Why don't gorillas vote?
They're ape-political.
What did the Gorilla say when he saw there was a sale happening?
Ooh! OOh! OOOh!!!!
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite toy?
A. A bab-boom-orang.
What do you call a gorilla with a machine gun ?
Whatever it wants to be called.
Q. What haapens if a gorilla sits on your piano?
A. You get a flat note.
Q. Why do educated gorillas like the numbers 1, 3, 5, 7, 11 and 13?
A. 'Cause they're prime apes.
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