What do you call an alligator that makes others fight?
An instigator.
Why shouldn’t you shoot an alligator?
He’ll just bite the bullet and make the best of it.
Some people like to play croc-quet.
What do you call an alligator that sneaks up and bites you from behind?
A tail-gator.
What do you call an alligator that’s a very skilled conversationalist?
A dialogator.
What type of flooring do alligators have in their homes?
Rep-tiles.
What has 80 teeth and 2 eyes ?
A crocodile.
I went to the zoo the other day and saw an alligator that will only eat finely chopped food.
It was an alligrator.
What is a nerdy alligator’s favorite programming language?
Jaw-va.
Alligators ask lots of questions, they'd make great interri-gators.
My pet crocodile needs help
Can I give him gatorade or does it only work for alligators?
A French photographer and his friend from Czechoslovakia were visiting Australia.
Unfortunately, one day they got too close to a nesting site and were attacked and eaten by a pair of crocodiles.
The female ate the Frenchman.
The Czech was in the male.
What do you call an alligator who is wearing crocs on his feet?
A traitor.
Whichever gator stole all the food, we'll catch the crook-a-dile.
What do you call an alligator who kills bugs all day long?
A fumigator.
Why won’t crocodiles attack lawyers?
Professional courtesy!
A guy wearing a suit and tie walks into a bar with an alligator…
He walks up to the bartender and asks, “Do you serve lawyers here?”
“Yes sir, we do,” says the bartender.
The guy smiles and says, “Great. Then I’ll have a beer, and my ‘gator will have a lawyer.”
What do crocodiles wear to keep their legs dry in the water?
Gaiters.
What do you call a reptile that works on a farm?
An irri-gator.
What do you get if you cross an alligator with a flower?
I don’t know, but I will not smell it!
What’s an alligator’s favorite dip?
Croc-amole.
What does an alligator do when he loses his tail?
It goes to a re-tail store.
How about the stylish female crocodile, she's every inch a frock-o-dile.
What do dehydrated alligators drink?
Gatorade.
Why should you never ever play texas hold'em with a crocodile?
You will literally lose every hand.
What do you call a crocodile that likes to bowl?
An alley-gator!
Who gives crocodiles presents on Christmas?
Santa Jaws!
Alligators can live up to 100 years…
Which is why there’s a chance that they will see you later.
You are really talented. You should join a punk-croc band.
What do you call an alligator that has all the other gators at the swamp crown around him?
A congregator.
What do you call people who are obsessed with crocodiles?
Crocophiles.
Why was the crocodile invited to glamorous parties?
Because she was a snappy dresser.
Why should you be careful not to insult a crocodile?
It may come back to bite you in the butt.
Have you seen the gators on skateboards, they are great alli-skaters.
What’s the difference between a dog and a gator?
A dog’s bark is worse than its bite.
When a girl saw a sad alligator at the zoo she asked him; hey are you cai-man?
What card game do crocodiles like playing?
Snap!
Did you hear about the crocodile who was unable to mate?
He had a reptile dysfunction.
A boy sees an alligator in the zoo and shouts,
“Hey, are you a caiman?”
The alligator replies, “I’m alright, thanks, kid!”
My favorite music is by Spandau Croc-quet.
Let's play some scrabble, I just need to get the croc-a-tiles.
Why don’t alligators watch movies?
Because they live in swamps.
What do you get if you put an alligator in a blender?
Gatorade.
What do you call a man who is too big for an alligator to eat?
A jawbreaker.
The weather's getting colder, I really fancy some hot croc-o-late.
What do you call an alligator that will only eat sacrificed lambs?
A hallaligator.
What do you call a crocodile that keeps breaking the law?
A crookadile.
If you need a mystery-solving, just call an in-vesti-gator.
Did you hear about the croc calling the frog? He just croc-o-dialled.
What’s the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
Alligators will see you later, crocodiles in a while.