Why can a leopard never hide for long? It’s always spotted
What is a cat’s favorite vegetable? As-purr-agus.
What do cats wear to bed? Paw-jamas.
Where did the independent cat decide to live? In Catalonia!
I painted a picture of my cat’s feet today.
You could say it was a paw-trait.
What is smarter than a talking cat? A spelling bee.
What is a cat’s favorite book? The Princess and the Paw-per.
What do cats eat on hot days?
Mice cream.
What’s the difference between a cat and a comma? One has claws at the end of its paws and the other has a pause at the end of a clause.
Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water?
They set a new lap record.
How is cat food sold? Usually, purr can!
What do cats do after watching a play? Give a round of a-paws.
Why do cats not laugh at jokes? They take things too litter-ally.
Where do kittens learn to move around? On the catwalk
What's the difference between a cat and a complex sentence?
A cat has claws at the end of its paws and a complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.
What do you get if you cross a tiger with a kangaroo? A stripy jumper!
What do you get if you cross a cat with a parrot? A carrot!
Why did the cat decide to sleep under the car? Because she wanted to wake up oily!
What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? An eskimew!
What kind of cat works for the Red Cross? A first-aid kit!
Where did the kittens go on a school field trip? To the mewseum
Why couldn’t the old cat see? He suffered from car-aracts
What animal has more lives than a cat? A frog … because he croaks every night!
Why do cats have minty breath? Because they use mousewash
Where do cats go when they die? Purr-gatory.
Who wears red and brings catnip to sleeping kittens? Santa Claws!
What did the scientist’s cat say? I think I’ve lost an electron, I’m pawsitive!
Why was the doctor’s favorite patient a cat? Because she has nine lives!
Why did the cat keep meow-ing? It didn’t want to be fur-gotten.
What did the confused cat say? I’m purr-plexed!
What happened to the cat that went to the flea circus? She stole the whole show.
What sport does a cat play? Hairball!
What do you call a cat that has a hundred legs? A cat-erpillar.
What is a cat’s favorite horror movie? The Purrrge!
What do you call a cat that works at a printing shop?
A copy cat.
What do cats read in the morning? The mewspaper!
Did you hear about the cat who drank ten bowls of water? It set a new lap record
What did the kitten say after a disaster? That was cat-astrophic
What do you call a cat that is scared of small spaces? Clawstrophobic!
What did the cat say when it saw something scary? That freaks meowt!
Why did the cat run away from the tree? Because of its bark!
Why couldn’t the cat finish watching her movie? Because she had it on paws!
What is a cat’s favorite movie? The Sound of Mew-sic.
What do you call a cat teacher? A purr-fessor
What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxi cabs.
What do you call a cat that was caught by the police? The purr-petrator.
What happened to the vet that was accused of negligence? They were sued for meow-practice
Where do cats go when they lose their tail? A re-tail store!
What did the cat do to someone she had wronged? She a-paw-logized.
Why are cats bad at telling stories? Because they only have one tail!
What type of cats usually purr the best? Purr-sians!