What type of cat belongs to the baker? One that’s pure-bread
Where do cats go when they die? Purr-gatory.
Why was the doctor’s favorite patient a cat? Because she has nine lives!
What do you get when you cross a tiger and a snowman? Frost-bite!
What is a cat’s favorite dessert? Chocolate mouse!
What animal has more lives than a cat? A frog … because he croaks every night!
What is a cat’s favorite horror movie? The Purrrge!
What type of cats usually purr the best? Purr-sians!
Have you ever seen a catfish? No, how did he hold the rod and reel?
What is a cat’s favorite deal? Buy one, get one furry.
What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxi cabs.
Where does a cat keep its coins? In its purr-se.
Where did the independent cat decide to live? In Catalonia!
What do you call a large pile of cats? A meowntain!
What do cats wear to bed? Paw-jamas.
What is a cat’s favorite color? Purr-ple.
What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? An eskimew!
How did the kittens express their love for each other? In Holy Catrimony
Why couldn’t the old cat see? He suffered from car-aracts
What is a cat’s favorite state of America? Connecti-cat.
What happened to the vet that was accused of negligence? They were sued for meow-practice
What is a cat’s favorite song? Three blind mice!
What did the cat say when he ate the clownfish? This tastes a little funny!
Why was the cat not allowed on the computer? Because she tried to catch the mouse!
Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water?
They set a new lap record.
What do you get if you cross a tiger with a kangaroo? A stripy jumper!
What is a cat’s favorite type of water? Purr-ified!
Why do cats not laugh at jokes? They take things too litter-ally.
What did the confused cat say? I’m purr-plexed!
What is a cat’s favorite magazine? Good Mousekeeping.
What happened to the cat that went to the flea circus? She stole the whole show.
What did the cat say when something bad happened? That’s un-fur-tunate!
What is a cat’s favorite Tom Hanks character? Furrest Gump.
What is smarter than a talking cat? A spelling bee.
Why did the cat run away from the tree? Because of its bark!
What type of cat lives under the sea? A purr-maid.
What do cats eat on hot days?
Mice cream.
What do you use to brush a dead cat? A catacomb!
Where do cats go when they lose their tail? A re-tail store!
If there were ten cats in a boat and one jumped out, how many would be left? None, because they were all copycats!
Why didn’t the boy believe the tiger? Because he thought it was a lion!
Why was the cat kicked out of the game? They thought she was a cheetah.
How is cat food sold? Usually, purr can!
Where do kittens learn to move around? On the catwalk
Why couldn’t the cat read a book? He was il-litter-ate!
Why did the cat keep meow-ing? It didn’t want to be fur-gotten.
Why do cats have minty breath? Because they use mousewash
My two cats had a fight today.
They soon hissed and made up though.
What's the difference between a cat and a complex sentence?
A cat has claws at the end of its paws and a complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.
Why couldn’t the cat finish watching her movie? Because she had it on paws!