What kind of bird always gets stuck in the nest? A velcrow.
What is a bunch of crows gathering money called? Crow funding.
What do you call a group of crows eating a box of corn flakes?
A cereal murder.
The public investigated a box full of crows because it was a murder case.
The police hung up the phone call when I informed them about a murder in my front yard. They said they could not do anything regarding the crows.
A crow invited his buddies over to hang out but they didn’t show up.
He was charged with attempted murder.
What is the name of the final exam you take when studying bird law? The crow bar.
It is said that crows and owls are in caw-hoots.
What is a crows favorite vegetable?
Corn on the caawb.
What did the irritated crow said to his fried?
I won't talk to you if you don’t stop ravening.
Why was the crow so angry after his stand up comedy gig? The venue paid him in coffee instead of caw fee.
What would a crow wear to the Halloween party? A crown!
My friend asked me how my pet crow communicates…
I replied, “Microwaves”.
The phone rings, and a crow picks it only to find out it’s for her husband. She then says: "Hey John, you have a phone caw."
Crows have 16 feather pinions and ravens have 17 pinions. It's just a matter of a pinion.
Crows hold grudges. They're also fond of eating the dead. Now...
they've been found to copulate with corpses.
NeCROWphilia.
I hate getting into arguments with farmers about the best methods for keeping crows away.
They always resort to straw man arguments.
Crows organized a cawnfrences, to discuss the upcoming project.
Went on a walk today. Had a couple of crows following me around. I'm pretty sure I have the corvid.
The flock of crows that were sprayed with sewage was a true definition of murder most foul.
The baby crow decided to dress up as his favorite vegetable on Halloween, he dressed up as a caw-liflower.
A woman bought a rooster, wanting to hear it crow.
However, it turns out the rooster was mute, so she was out of cluck.
What do you call two crows flying together?
An attempted murder
What do crows drink in order to stay awake? They drink cawfee.
Who was the criminal crow running from? The cawps.
Which Halloween treat is going to keep a crow up all night? A crowfee apple.
What is the popular computer game that crows play? Caw of Duty!
Why are crows so interesting?
Just beCAWse
Why was the crow upset about his job? The HR fired the crow with no caws.
What’s the difference between a crow and a chicken?
A chicken can crow, but a crow can’t chicken.
For waterproofing their nests, crows buy caw-king.
Wondering what crows prefer with soup, crows like crowtons in their soup.
What did the crow decide to dress up as on Halloween? As a scarecrow.
What is the favorite bread of a crow? Crow-issant.
A bear covered in a bunch of crows gives the picture of a grizzly murder.
What’s black, dangerous and hides in trees?
A crow with a machine gun.
My Chinese neighbour said he's just opened a crows shop.
Speaking slowly, I said "you mean a *clothes* shop?"
He says, "No, a crows shop - come in and have a rook."
Why are crows the safest flying birds?
They're the most CAWtious.
The cawllarborne of the skinny crow was so pronounced.
Don't give up at this stage, just keep cawing on, you will do great.
When buying crows for commercial use, always buy them in groups...
That way, you’re guaranteed to make a killing.
There was a recent study showing that crows were hit a lot more by trucks than cars...
they came to the conclusion that this was because crows can warn each other by going "CAAAR CAAAR" but can't say "TRUCK TRUCK".
What kind of ice cream do pigs like best?
Hoggin Daz!
What do you call it when a raven marries a crow? A conspiracy to commit to murder.
What did the teenage crow want for his birthday? A brand new caw!
Two crows land on a park bench.
They were arrested for conspiring to murder.
How can you tell the difference between an English and French crow?
"PourCUAWWW! PourCUAWWW!"
A guy walks into a crow bar
It's a murder scene
What do crows read? Cawmics.
And the collective nouns go: a murder of crows, a herd of cows, a migraine of children.