Why do grizzlies never look sad?
Because whenever there’s a problem, they just grin and bear it.
What did the bear say when her date showed up too early?
I’ll be out in a minute, I’m bearly dressed.
What do you call two polar bears jerking each other off?
Bipolar.
Why don’t bears eat fast food?
Because it’s hard for them to catch.
Have you ever had a dream about a bear eating you?
I call them bite-mares.
What kind of car does Yogi bear drive?
A Furrari.
I’ll think of another pun soon…
Just bear with me.
How does a bear stop a movie?
They hit the paws button.
Who is a polar bear’s favorite musician?
Seal.
What do you call a bear with no arms and no legs?
An ambulance. This is no time for jokes.
What do you call a grizzly bear who gets caught in the rain?
A drizzly bear.
How do you stop a bear from charging?
Take away its credit cards.
Why didn’t the teddy bear want any dessert?
He was already stuffed.
What do you call a polar bear in Florida?
A solar bear.
What is a polar bear’s favorite snack?
Brrrrrittos.
What do you get if you cross a teddy bear with a pig?
A teddy boar.
Why did God create Yogi bear?
Because on his first try he made a Boo-Boo.
What is a bear’s favorite dessert?
Blue beary pie.
Goldilocks was killed last night.
The killers did it with their own bear hands.
How can a bear catch fish without a pole?
They use their bear hands.
Why did the bear dissolve in water?
It was polar.
What cheese do you use to get a bear out of a tree?
Camembert.
How does a bear get from one place to another?
On a bear-o-plane.
What do you call bears with no ears?
B.
What is a bear’s favorite soda?
Coca Koala.
What do you call a cemetery for bears?
Bearial grounds.
How did the grizzly walk in the snow?
Bear footed.
Where do polar bears keep their money?
In a snow bank.
What color socks do bears wear?
They don’t wear socks, they have bear feet.
How do bears keep their houses cool in summer?
Bear conditioning.