What do you call a kangaroo DJ?
Disc joey.
What do you call an angry kangaroo?
Hopping mad.
Why don’t kangaroos make good sailors?
Because they’re always jumping ship.
What is a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring!
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite drink?
A juice pouch.
What do you call it when a marsupial tricks you?
A kanga-ruse.
Did you know you can fit 30 bananas in a kangaroo’s pouch?
Also, I’m not allowed at the zoo anymore.
Kangaroo: [dials 9-1-1] I can’t find my kids!
9-1-1: Did you check your pockets?
Kangaroo: [pats pouch] Oh… nevermind.
What’s something a kangaroo has that no other animal has?
Baby kangaroos.
Why are kangaroos so qualified to be teachers?
Because they’re kan-gurus.
What do you call a kangaroo that’s exhausted from trespassing?
Out of bounds.
A spider, a snake, and a kangaroo walk into a bar…
It’s a normal day in Australia.
What do you get when you mix an elephant and a kangaroo?
Big holes all over Australia.
How does a kangaroo win a gold medal?
In the long jump.
What do you call two kangaroos who live together?
Roo-mates.
Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?
Because then the kids have to play indoors.
What do you call 144 kangaroos in a box?
Gross.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
How do sick kangaroos get better?
They have a hoperation.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with an alien?
A Mars-upial.
What do you call a talking kangaroo?
A quantum leap.
What do drunk kangaroos play?
Hopscotch.
How does a kangaroo pick his favorite baseball team?
He jumps on the bandwagon.
What kind of music do sophisticated kangaroos listen to?
Hopera.
Where do kangaroos like to eat?
At IHOP.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and a sheep?
A woolly good jumper.
I saw a really cool kangaroo the other day
It had a hip hop
What do you call twin baby kangaroos?
Roo-mMates!
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite candy?
Lollihops.
What animal jumps when it walks and sits when it stands?
A kangaroo.
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo?
“Hop on!”
What do stylish kangaroos wear?
Jumpsuits.
Did you hear about the kangaroo with glasses?
He had to go to the hopthalmologist.