How do you confuse a fish?
Put the fish in a round fishbowl and tell it to go to the corner.
Which fish is the most famous? The starfish.
Why are some fish at the bottom of the ocean?
Because they dropped out of the school.
How do you communicate with a fish?
Drop him a line.
How does a group of sea turtles make a decision?
They flipper a coin.
Why was the whale so sad?
The fish was said because he was a Blue whale!
Where do fish save their money?
In the river bank.
What is the difference between a fish and a piano?
You can’t tuna fish.
Why do fish like worms?
Fish like worms because they’re hooked on them.
Why did the fish cross the road?
The chicken had the days off!
Why did the whale cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
What kind of whale can fly?
A Pilot whale.
Who does a fish call when his piano breaks?
The piano tuna!
What’s the easiest way to catch fish? Have someone throw it at you!
How do clams call their friends?
Clams call their friends on their shell phones!
How to fish like to eat cereal?
In a fish bowl!
What do fish use for money?
Sand dollars!
What are the fastest fish in the river? The motor-pike with a side-carp!
Where do fish stay on a campsite?
Fish stay in tentacles while they are camping!
How do fish get from place to place while playing golf?
With a golf carp,
What do you get when you cross an elephant and a fish?
Swimming trunks!
What kind of fish do you find in a bird cage?
A perch!
Why couldn’t the clownfish buy a house?
The fish could not buy a house because he didn’t have an-e-mon-e!
Which sea creatures cry the most?
Whales!
How many tickles does it take to make a squid laugh?
Ten-tickles!
What fish like to fly?
Flying Fish
What fish perform at the circus?
Clown fish!
What is the most expensive kind of fish?
The goldfish.
Which fish go to heaven when they die?
Angelfish.
What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
‘I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand!’
Why don’t fish play basketball?
Because they're afraid of the net.
What did the fish say when he posted bail?
I’m off the hook!
Why don’t oysters share their pearls? Oysters don’t share their pearls because they’re shellfish!
Why did the girl pour glue into her fishbowl?
She wanted to make a fish stick!
How do shellfish get to the hospital?
In a clambulance!
What do you call a fish with a tie?
Sofishticated!
Which fish can perform operations?
A Sturgeon.
Why did the sailor throw a penny into the whale’s mouth?
The sailor thought he was was a wishing whale!
What’s the coldest fish in the sea?
A blue whale!
How does an octopus go to war?
Well-armed!
What kind of fish will help you hear?
A herring aid!
What do fish use to weigh themselves?
Scales!
Why are fish so smart?
Because they live in a school.
What did the fish say to the other fish? Pucker-fish!
What do you call a fish with two knees? A two-knee-fish!
Who granted the fish’s wish?
The fairy cod mother!
What fish are at the zoo?
Lion fish!
Why are fish so smart?
They are always in schools!
What do you call two octopuses that look alike?
I-tentacle twins!
Why do you bring fish to a party?
You bring fish to a party because they go well with chips!