Did you hear that Notre Dame gave up four interceptions last week?
Knute Rockne would turnover in his grave!
What must the Oregon football team do before each play?
Get all of their ducks in a row.
We’re calling your number.
[Chicken] We’re serving this during the game, so you might call it a live ball fowl.
Why couldn't the warden decide whether to allow the prison football team play the professional football team?
The idea had its pros and cons.
Calm before the score
Why don't quarterbacks share puns at the line of scrimmage? Because they produce audible groans!
Did you hear about the football team that drafted a vending machine?
They really needed a quarter back!
Why did the football referee have trouble measuring the first down?
Someone was yanking his chain!
How do you call football without shoes?
Socker.
What do you call a boat full of polite football players?
A good sportsman ship
No intentional frowning is allowed here.
Hope you’re wide open on [date].
Why wasn’t the pig chosen in the football/soccer team?
It was a ball hogger.
I have a lot of respect for fans of football teams that consist of only ghosts
They have a lot of spirit.
Did you hear about the fumbled exorcism? The guy retained possession!
Why can’t a car play football?
Because it only has one boot.
Why is a Tornado the best type of football player?
Because it always gets touchdowns.
I’ve been getting blitzed all game.
Why was the football pitch a triangle?
Because someone took a corner
What kind of insect is bad at football?
A fumble-bee.
I’m establishing my punning game early today.
A knife tried out for Varsity football.
It didn't make the cut.
[Bundled Up Guy] This is what you call man coverage.
The calm before the score
Did I tell you about my new girlfriend who also plays football?
Yeah.. she‘s a keeper
Football is one habit I will never kick.
What is a bird that flies over a football field called?
A fieldgull.
Why couldn't the skeleton play football?
He didn't have the guts.
Having a ball
The huddle is real
I had a really good fantasy football team.
Then, My Luck ran out.
I just watched Sunday Night Football.
There were Lutz and Lutz of field goals.
We’ll have a ball.
What did the football player say to his Chinese son
Go Long!
Where do sperm play football?
In a con-dome.
Beauty is only pig skin deep
What happened when the football coach’s dog ran onto the field during a game?
He got called for ineligible retriever down field!
I feel tail great!
I made a snap decision to watch football today
Why was the potato fired from his job at the football stadium?
He was a horrible commentater.
This event is sure to be out of bounds.
I made a snap decision to watch football today.
Do you know why an octopus is so good at Football?
It gets ten tackles a play.
Having a ball this weekend with my best friends
What is a defensive football players favorite dessert?
Apple Turnover.
[Drink] That’s a thirst down!
Did you hear about the Heisman Trophy candidate who falsified his rushing stats?
The yards were stacked in his favor!
I like your tight end
My girlfriend told me she's breaking up with me because of my football obsession.
I told her she'll need to wait till the summer window if she wants a free transfer.
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