Welcome to FRIDAY Night football - the kind of Football Puns you share with your friends and have a laugh with over a game party!

Why can’t a car play football?
Because it only has one boot.
Football is one habit I will never kick
Did you hear about the football team that drafted a vending machine?
They really needed a quarter back!
Kicking off the afternoon in the best way possible
If an Octopus were to play football, how many tackles per game would an Octopus have?
Tentacles
Why was McGruff the Crime Dog ejected from the football game?
He was called for unnecessary gruffness!
I may not be the biggest football fan, but I love tight ends.
How do you call football without shoes?
Socker.
What do you call a Spanish football player with no legs?
Gracias.
Did I tell you about my new girlfriend who also plays football?
Yeah.. she‘s a keeper
Why did the football coach attempt to destroy the vending machine?
Cuz it wouldn't give him his quarterback.
[Donuts] We’re going the hole nine yards for this game.
What stat do the Miami Dolphins lead every single year?
All Porpoise Yardage!
I just watched Sunday Night Football.
There were Lutz and Lutz of field goals.
I’m establishing my punning game early today.
Hope you’re wide open on [date].
[Chicken] We’re serving this during the game, so you might call it a live ball fowl.
Case in punt
Why was the football pitch a triangle?
Because someone took a corner
By the seat of one’s punt
[Chips] This is what I call a chip shot.
Having a ball this weekend with my best friends
Why don’t quarterbacks share puns at the line of scrimmage?
Because they produce audible groans!
What happened when the football coach’s dog ran onto the field during a game?
He got called for ineligible retriever down field!
Jokes are a lot like American football.
If you haven't gotten anywhere with the first three tries, you'll need to rely on your punner.
I almost brought a screwdriver to the football game, but was stopped by security
They said that match-fixing isn't allowed.
I’ve never lost a game of football basketball or volleyball!
Though I’ve never played a game either.
Why did the uncouth spud not stop talking during the football game?
Because he was a common-tater.
Give me some pigskin
Do you know why an octopus is so good at Football?
It gets ten tackles a play.