Fishing Puns

Welcome to our Fishing Puns! Warning: Read just one and you're hooked for life!

What is the difference between a catfish and a lawyer? One is a bottom-dwelling, scum-sucking scavenger and the other is a fish!
Why did the vegan go deep-sea fishing? Just for the halibut!
What did the fisherman say to the card magician? Take a cod, any cod.
What do you call a Sith Lord who likes to go fishing? Darth Wader.
If fish lived on land, in which country would they live? Finland.
What does the pope eat during lent? Holy mackerel!
What is the fastest fish in the water? A motopike
Why did the fish cross the road? Cause it was hooked!
What swims in the sea, carries a machine gun, and makes you an offer you can't refuse? The Codfather
What do fish and women have in common? They both stop shaking their tale after you catch them!
Why can't you tell a joke while ice fishing? Because it'll crack you up!.
What is the difference between a fish and a piano? You can't tuna fish.
How do you communicate with a fish? Drop it a line!
What do you call a fish whith a car? A carfish!
What did one hillbilly say to another? I got a new fly rod and reel for my wife. Best trade I ever made.
What did the fish say when it hit a concrete wall "Dam!"
Why are fish so smart Because they swim in schools!
What do you call a small fish magician? A magic carpet
What did the magician say to the fisherman?
"Pick a cod, any cod."
Which fish can perform operations? A Sturgeon!
Where do football players go shopping in the offseason? The tackle shop.
Where does a fish keep his money In the River Bank!
Why are fisherman so stingy?
Their jobs make them sel-fish!
Where does a fisherman go to get his hair cut?
The fisherman goes to a bobber shop!
What did the fishermen say to the fish that swam away? "You bass-tard!"
Where do fish sleep? In a river bed
Guy: Have you ever been fishing before? Girl: Why? Boy: I think we should hook up!
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