[Food Spread] This is the line of scrumptiousness.
[Bundled Up Guy] This is what you call man coverage.
I made a snap decision to watch football today.
What’s a Movers favorite football team?
The Packers!
Don’t drop the ball – without you, the party will be incomplete.
We’ll kickoff the party with some cocktails.
The calm before the score
Beauty is only pig skin deep
Jokes are a lot like American football.
If you haven't gotten anywhere with the first three tries, you'll need to rely on your punner.
Don’t pass on this party – rush on over.
I have a lot of respect for fans of football teams that consist of only ghosts
They have a lot of spirit.
I almost brought a screwdriver to the football game, but was stopped by security
They said that match-fixing isn't allowed.
Join us for plenty of play action.
Why wasn’t the pig chosen in the football/soccer team?
It was a ball hogger.
We’re calling your number.
Kicking off the afternoon in the best way possible
What must the Oregon football team do before each play?
Get all of their ducks in a row.
I feel tail great!
You shouldn't wear glasses when playing football...
They say it's a contact sport.
I’ve been getting blitzed all game
[Chips] This is what I call a chip shot.
A knife tried out for Varsity football.
It didn't make the cut.
Why did the football coach attempt to destroy the vending machine?
Cuz it wouldn't give him his quarterback.
What do you call a horse that is good at football?
Neighhhhh-mar.
Why was the potato fired from his job at the football stadium?
He was a horrible commentater.
What stat do the Miami Dolphins lead every single year?
All Porpoise Yardage!
Here’s the game plan: [party details]
With salsa, cheese dip, and guac, our bowl game is hot.
[Chicken] We’re serving this during the game, so you might call it a live ball fowl.
By the seat of one’s punt
Why couldn't the skeleton play football?
He didn't have the guts.
Staying humble thanks to that fumble
I’ve never lost a game of football basketball or volleyball!
Though I’ve never played a game either.
Why’s it always hot after a football game?
All the fans left.
I may not be the biggest football fan, but I love tight ends.
I had a really good fantasy football team.
Then, My Luck ran out.
What happened when the football coach’s dog ran onto the field during a game?
He got called for ineligible retriever down field!
Hope you’re wide open on [date].
Why did the uncouth spud not stop talking during the football game?
Because he was a common-tater.
What type of football player is the biggest drug addict?
The lineman.
Give me some pigskin
Why is Cinderella bad at football?
Because she’s always running away from the ball.
What do Walter Payton and Luke Skywalker have in common?
They both did great with a hand off!
I just watched Sunday Night Football.
There were Lutz and Lutz of field goals.
Why was McGruff the Crime Dog ejected from the football game?
He was called for unnecessary gruffness!
If an Octopus were to play football, how many tackles per game would an Octopus have?
Tentacles
Did you hear about the Heisman Trophy candidate who falsified his rushing stats?
The yards were stacked in his favor!
What do you call it when a football player suffers a career-ending injury in his last game before retirement? Gridirony!
I like big punts and I cannot lie
What do you call a giant that's good at football?
Goaliath.
o my friend Justin was late for the football game.
But that’s okay because he arrived Justin time for kickoff.
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