The huddle is real
What do Walter Payton and Luke Skywalker have in common?
They both did great with a hand off!
Having a ball
This event is sure to be out of bounds.
Football is one habit I will never kick.
What do you call a horse that is good at football?
Neighhhhh-mar.
Why couldn't the warden decide whether to allow the prison football team play the professional football team?
The idea had its pros and cons.
What type of football player is the biggest drug addict?
The lineman.
What did the foot say to the football?
I toed you.
No intentional frowning is allowed here.
Did you hear that Notre Dame gave up four interceptions last week?
Knute Rockne would turnover in his grave!
I’ve been getting blitzed all game.
Did I tell you about my new girlfriend who also plays football?
Yeah.. she‘s a keeper
A goal new ball game I he a kick outta you
Where do sperm play football?
In a con-dome.
I went to Oxford University, where I was a philosophy major and the starting goalkeeper on the football team.
They called me Soccertes.
What do you call it when a football player suffers a career-ending injury in his last game before retirement? Gridirony!
By the seat of one’s punt
Why don't quarterbacks share puns at the line of scrimmage? Because they produce audible groans!
What did the football player say to his Chinese son
Go Long!
We’re calling your number.
Why is Cinderella bad at football?
Because she’s always running away from the ball.
Join us for plenty of play action.
[Chips] This is what I call a chip shot.
Why’s it always hot after a football game?
All the fans left.
If an Octopus were to play football, how many tackles per game would an Octopus have?
Tentacles
I almost brought a screwdriver to the football game, but was stopped by security
They said that match-fixing isn't allowed.
Did you hear about the fumbled exorcism? The guy retained possession!
Did you hear about the football team that drafted a vending machine?
They really needed a quarter back!
We’ll kickoff the party with some cocktails.
Why did the football coach attempt to destroy the vending machine?
Cuz it wouldn't give him his quarterback.
Give me some pigskin
What kind of insect is bad at football?
A fumble-bee.
The goal nine yards
Hope you’re wide open on [date].
What stat do the Miami Dolphins lead every single year?
All Porpoise Yardage!
I made a snap decision to watch football today
Beauty is only pig skin deep
The calm before the score
I like big punts and I cannot lie
Jokes are a lot like American football.
If you haven't gotten anywhere with the first three tries, you'll need to rely on your punner.
I made a snap decision to watch football today.
A knife tried out for Varsity football.
It didn't make the cut.
I’ve been getting blitzed all game
[Drink] That’s a thirst down!
What must the Oregon football team do before each play?
Get all of their ducks in a row.
I just watched Sunday Night Football.
There were Lutz and Lutz of field goals.
I have a lot of respect for fans of football teams that consist of only ghosts
They have a lot of spirit.
Why did the kicker finally decide to marry his high school sweetheart?
She was a fair catch!
[Bundled Up Guy] This is what you call man coverage.
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