Why is Cinderella bad at soccer?
Because she’s always running away from the ball.
Case in punt
The Montreal baseball team relocated to Tampa after being purchased by the
Exposito bros.
What do you get if cross a baseball player and a monster?
A double header.
Oh buoy – we’re having a splash bash!
Where do baseball players wash up?
In the bat tub.
What do you call heels on ski boots?
Ski lifts.
What do you call a horse that is good at football?
Neighhhhh-mar.
The reason why soccer players are brilliant in math is because they know how to use their heads well.
What do you get if you cross a baseball pitcher and a carpet?
A throw rug.
Why did the volleyball player cross the street? There were players on the other side.
Why did Tarzan spend so much time on the golf course?
He was perfecting his swing
What do you get when you run behind a car?
Exhausted!
When the pitch is flooded, soccer players can still go on. They just need to bring on their subs.
What did the player on the Bumblebee basketball team say after making a foul shot?
Hive Scored!
What do volleyball players like in bed? Kinky sets.
Ski Area Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, do you believe in love at first sight, or should I go around this chairlift again?
What did they give former Flyers left-winger Brian when he successfully
bulked up? Massive Propps.
Why are Scandinavians the fastest runners in the world?
Because they start out near the Finnish line.
Why is it annoying to eat next to basketball players?
They dribble all the time.
Brother: "I saw a seahorse scuba diving"
Dad: "Wow that's amazing, I didn't realise they had the technology."
How do you call football without shoes?
Socker.
Why do blind people hate diving?
It scares the hell out of their dogs.
Why did the kid pursue scuba diving?
Because all his grades are below C-level.
In Quebec they used to practise throwing the puck in the zone, and then
sitting back to wait for a turnover. But eventually the players were
criticized for this dump-and-chaise tactic.
Basketball players at times get athletes foot. Come to think of it, it is like the missle toe astronauts get.
It feels great to hit the ball again. It spin a long time.
How do you communicate with a fish? Drop it a line!
Why don't orphans make good baseball players?
Because they don't know where home is.
I went to Oxford University, where I was a philosophy major and the starting goalkeeper on the football team.
They called me Soccertes.
Most of your players never make it out of the lower-level tournaments. I highly doubt their Futures as a professional.
What is American football called in other countries?
30.48 cm ball.
When she saw all the madness around her, March said, “what’s all that bracket”.
The favorite soccer position for ghosts is the ghoul keeper.
Why should you never go back in time to alter the outcome of a football game?
You’ll be called for past interference!
Staying humble thanks to that fumble
Kicking off the afternoon in the best way possible
A baseball walks into a bar. The bartender throws him out.
What should you do when you play volleyball against a team of satanists? You beat the hell out of them.
Do you want to know what you get when you cross a newborn snake with a basketball? Really! Ooh you will end up with a bouncing baby boa.
Ana hits a lot of floating shots that her opponents destroy for winners. We need to sitter down and have a talk.
Why did the kicker finally decide to marry his high school sweetheart?
She was a fair catch!
Why did the volleyball player get sent to jail? Because he was set up.
What is the fastest way to make a setter angry? Each time you make a pass, tell the setter the ball is “Up” and then say “Yours!”
What type of stroke does a classical musician use when swimming?
The Bach stroke!
What do a rabid rabbit and a basketball player have in common?
Mad hops.
Why was the mummy added to the game as a pinch hitter?
Because the manager knew he could wrap it up.
What type of noodles do swimmers like best?
Pool noodles!
Which trophy has the most glitz? The Lady Bling.
Some call them opponents. We call them victims. It sounds like you have the right mindset to succeed on the court!
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