I used to hate tennis, but ever since I’ve started winning 6-0, I love it now.
Do you know how to dunk cookies? Ask a basketball chef.
Today I donated my old basketball hoop to a school for the blind.
It will be missed.
What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine?
Give me my quarter back.
The soccer player brought string to her game because she wanted to tie the score.
Why did the blonde volleyball player end up getting fired from her waitressing job? Someone said she needed to serve the food.
Do you want to know what you get when you cross a newborn snake with a basketball? Really! Ooh you will end up with a bouncing baby boa.
This is one spray-cation to remember.
What type of stroke does a classical musician use when swimming?
The Bach stroke!
A hippie when his opponent disputes his calls: That’s pretty far-out, man!
How do you call stage diving at Oktoberfest?
Krautsurfing.
Why were there cows on the baseball field?
Because they were looking for the bullpen.
The reason why soccer players are brilliant in math is because they know how to use their heads well.
Why don’t quarterbacks share puns at the line of scrimmage?
Because they produce audible groans!
Why were the volleyball players always tying in tic tac toe? Each time one of them sets an X, the other player just says O.
I wish they’d change the scoring system, but tennis is set in its ways and doesn’t see the point.
hat do you call it when a runner from Moscow starts a race at Red Square that ends in Finland?
Russian to the Finnish.
What type of noodles do swimmers like best?
Pool noodles!
How can you tell a vampire likes baseball? Every night he turns into a bat.
Why did the skier from Helsinki dominate the downhill slalom competition?
He led the race from start to Finnish.
You can forget about winning, princess. Because even Cinderella can’t get to this ball.
What do runners do when they forget something?
They jog their memory!
What did the fisherman say to the card magician? Take a cod, any cod.
They say that you can spike a volleyball. But you can never take away its dig-nity.
How are baseball umpires and angry chickens alike?
Both make fowl calls.
"What are your thoughts on diving?"
"Well, I guess it's descent as a hobby."
Jack has a large neck so he decided to wear a bowtie to his wedding. Otherwise, he’d end up with a tiebreak.
What happens if you read too many Painful baseball Puns?
You're left in stitches.
There is a commonality between a thanksgiving and a bowler guest. They both love turkey.
Every player knows pretty well that they cannot afford to go through life without goals.
After the guy broke his arm skiing, he realized it was all downhill from there.
Where do spiders play football?
Webley Stadium.
What did the bowling pins do?
They went on strike.
Why did the blonde run backward?
She wanted to gain weight.
I prefer the new system to reviewing line calls. When Hawk-eye came around, I breathed a big Cy-clops of relief.
What is the difference between a Yankees fan and a dentist?
One roots for the Yanks, and the other yanks for the roots. OUCH.
Most of your players never make it out of the lower-level tournaments. I highly doubt their Futures as a professional.
Having a ball
Some call them opponents. We call them victims. It sounds like you have the right mindset to succeed on the court!
The walls in this tennis factory are so thin, that when I try to get some work done, all I hear is people making a racquet.
Which Star Wars movie is a baseball player's least favorite?
The Umpire Strikes Back.
We’ll have a ball.
What happened when the football coach’s dog ran onto the field during a game?
He got called for ineligible retriever down field!
Guy: Have you ever been fishing before? Girl: Why? Boy: I think we should hook up!
What is the difference between a fish and a piano? You can't tuna fish.
Why are fisherman so stingy?
Their jobs make them sel-fish!
My football teammate asked me, “On a scale of 1-10, how do you rate our after-victory celebration?”
I gave him a high five.
What do baseball players eat their backyard BBQ on?
Home plates.
What is a golfer’s worst nightmare?
The Bogeyman.
Why did the ski instructor's love life always go downhill? The first thing the ladies noticed about him was his giant slalom.
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