Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Eyesore.
Eyesore who?
Eyesore from my long run—can we take the elevator?
Why were the volleyball players always tying in tic tac toe? Each time one of them sets an X, the other player just says O.
The football won’t be the only thing spiked at this party.
[Drink] That’s a thirst down!
What do volleyball players watch during their free time? They watch Spike TV.
If an Octopus were to play football, how many tackles per game would an Octopus have?
Tentacles
What do baseball players eat their backyard BBQ on?
Home plates.
What did the mitt say to the baseball?
Hey baby, you're quite a catch.
Which author is anxious to write the book: Colorado Rockies, World Series Champs?
Ben Whayten.
What is a golfer’s favorite dance move?
The Bogey.
You cannot get a basketball game fairly officiated in the jungle because cheetahs are all over.
What did they give former Flyers left-winger Brian when he successfully
bulked up? Massive Propps.
Why did the football referee have trouble measuring the first down?
Someone was yanking his chain!
My moment in the sun.
Basketball players at times get athletes foot. Come to think of it, it is like the missle toe astronauts get.
Why can’t I ever win a game returning serve? Give me a break.
What swims in the sea, carries a machine gun, and makes you an offer you can't refuse? The Codfather
Brother: "I saw a seahorse scuba diving"
Dad: "Wow that's amazing, I didn't realise they had the technology."
Give me some pigskin
What does a bowler and a Thanksgiving guest have in common?
They both want a Turkey.
Get in the swim this summer.
Why do you need six players to carry the volleyball to the game? No one can carry the volleyball and a whole team.
Did you hear the joke about the pop fly? Oh, nevermind. It was over your head...
Both tournament directors published the schedule at the same time. It was a draw.
Which front-office type is the most promiscuous? The general ménageur.
What do volleyball players like in bed? Kinky sets.
When the pitch is flooded, soccer players can still go on. They just need to bring on their subs.
Why did the kid pursue scuba diving?
Because all his grades are below C-level.
If volleyball were easy, they would call it football.
Why is Cinderella bad at soccer?
Because she’s always running away from the ball.
Why are nuns such great sprint runners?
'Cause they're used to being chaste.
All punts are highly intended
Having a ball this weekend with my best friends
Why do the ladies love baseball?
Because diamonds are a girl's best friend.
What do Walter Payton and Luke Skywalker have in common?
They both did great with a hand off!
What do runners do when they forget something?
They jog their memory!
Join us for plenty of play action.
You can forget about winning, princess. Because even Cinderella can’t get to this ball.
Why did the vegetarian stop running cross country?
He did not like the meets.
What game do some skiers like to play on the road trip to the slopes?
Ice Spy With My Little Ice.
I want to practice my forehand outside, but it will be wet in the morning and nice later on. So here’s the plan for today: inside-out.
I have a lot of respect for fans of football teams that consist of only ghosts
They have a lot of spirit.
Who wrote the fantasy novel How To Be A Better Baseball Player?
Ben Schwarmer.
Native Americans used to have their own professional tennis tournaments, and provided free housing to players from other tribes. They called it the A Tee Pee Tour. (No disrespect to Native Americans!)
What do you call heels on ski boots?
Ski lifts.
Why can’t a car play football?
Because it only has one boot.
Can linesmen enter the Hall of Fame? Yes, because they decide who's HOFside.
Football is one habit I will never kick.
Did you know that old bowlers do not die? They simply end up in gutters.
I really hate these strings. I can feel it in my gut.
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