What happened to the wooden car with a wooden engine and wheels? It wooden go at all.
What sort of cakes do snowmen like?
The ones with thick icing!
Did you hear about the loggers who stopped cutting down the forest? The trees really felt re-leafed.
Where do American trees like to go for vacations in Canada? Montreeal.
What do you call a gestalt consciousness of plants?
A chive mind.
What do you call an old snowman?
Water.
Why is it always quiet in the forest? Because all of the trees sleep like a dog.
How did the mushroom end up on a vacation abroad? It was just a spore of the moment decision!
What did the flower say when he wanted a second chance?
I’ll grow on you.
Why did the banana tree have to make a doctor’s appointment during the hurricane? Her fruit was peeling under the weather.
What do you call a snowman in the summer?
A Puddle.
What did the Jedi tell the sacred tree? May the forest be with you.
I dropped my cactus the other day
Worst part is, I caught it
What do snowmen eat for lunch?
Icebergers!
If there was to be a beauty contest bringing together all the beautiful mushrooms on the face of the earth, the porta-bella mushroom would carry the day.
I always invite the mushroom to my party because he is such a fun-guy.
What do you see when an elephant hides behind a tree?
The trunks
At the party, the vegetarian girl won’t eat the mushrooms, reason being, somebody told her that they were oyster mushrooms.
What does the youngest flower child say?
Last bud not least!
There are lots of funny jokes about mushrooms that can give you stitches. However, you need to be patient enough because they need time to grow on you.
Did you hear about the flower who never bloomed?
It was a bud omen.
Farmers were in an all out war to decide which vegetable they would plant
It was resolved with a Peas Treaty.
Why did the Sugar Maple have to go to the dentist? It really needed a root canal.
How do trees get onto the internet? They just log on.
What looks like half a pine tree? The other half.
What do you call a martial arts expert in a tree?
Bruce Leaf.
Why can’t a Christmas tree sew? It keeps dropping its needles.
I told my friend a tree pun.
He was stumped.
I was thinking about using a mushroom to poison someone. My morel stopped me.
What happens when you blend an artificial waterway with a tree? You get a root canal.
What do you call it when you plant a tree at each corner of a house?
A fourest.
What do you call a snowman that tells tall tales?
A snow-fake!
What do you call a snowman on rollerblades?
A snowmobile.
What do you get when you plant a Donut?
A pastree.
Did you hear about the aspen who fell for the loggers’ scam? The copse wood not believe she fell for it.
What did the rock say after it rolled into a tree? Nothing because rocks can’t talk.
What did the grouchy mushroom say to the loud mushroom? - Put a cap on it.
Have you ever heard of mushroom cars? Well, they have an interesting sound which goes line shroom shroom!
What has leaves, is green and a trunk? A houseplant heading on vacation.
Why are bad knitters and Christmas trees alike? They both drop their needles.
A chemist plants a seed.
He takes good care of it every day. He waters it and fertilizes the soil around it. As it becomes a big and healthy tree, the chemist thinks to himself: What a good chemist-tree.
What do you call ten Arctic hares hopping backwards through the snow together?
A receding hare line.
What do chic evergreens wear for cruelty-free fashion? Faux fir.
Why are trees a popular Christmas decoration? They look good in boughs.
Why did the flower take her husband back after he cheated?
She rose above it.
What type of diet did the snowman go on?
The Meltdown Diet.
Why do trees always hate taking tests? Because they keep getting stumped by the questions.
What did the teacher say when he sent the naughty student out of the (mush)room? - You’re in big truffle young man!
I am still trying to launch beef and cream out of a mushroom cannon. It is not stroganoff.
Don’t ask me for any tree puns.
Acacia haven’t noticed I’m all out.
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