Why did the fisherman start doing drugs?
Pier pressure.
Are you addicted to the ocean and ocean life?
If you are, sea kelp
Why does the ocean roar?
You would too if you had crabs on your bottom.
Where does seaweed look for a job?
In the kelp-wanted section.
What does the fish say when she disagrees with her husband?
I don’t quite sea it that way.
Why are seabirds so lucky in love?
Because one good tern always deserves another.
I can't believe I can't see the bottom of the ocean.
It's unfathomable.
How are bad school grades like a shipwreck in the Arctic Ocean? They're both below C level!
Did you hear about the lawyer who tried to sue a shark for biting all his limbs off?
He didn’t have a leg to stand on.
What do baleen whales call a hook-up?
Netflix and krill.
Do you know what would happen when you throw a Finnish sailor into the ocean?
Helsinki.
Why do freshwater fish cry so much?
They’re just a stream of emotions.
Why did the fisherman suddenly redirect his boat?
Just for the halibut.
What did the wise papa fish tell his son?
Keep your friends close and your anemones closer.
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
A red ship and a blue ship collided in the ocean.
Apparently the survivors are marooned.
What did the carp say to his crush?
Don’t play koi with me!
What does a fish say when he makes a mistake?
It was just a fluke!
What do you call two bandits in a race on the ocean.
Piracy.
What did the ocean say when asked if he wanted to be friends with the beach?
“Shore!”
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on your doorstep? Matt. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean?
Bob.
Why Did the Whale Cross the Ocean?
To get to the other tide.
Why is the ocean always blue?
Because the shore never waves back.
What did the lobsterman say when his crate turned up empty?
It a-piers we have a problem.
Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years at C!
How did the shark plead in the murder case?
Not gill-ty.
I wanted make a joke about the ocean, but it's too deep
Australia announced that they have begun dumping sewage into the ocean
It’s now classified as an in-continent.
What did the sarcastic otter say?
I think you’ve confused me with someone who builds a dam.
Where do shellfish go to borrow money?
The prawn broker.
I went fishing in the ocean the other day and caught one fish
but I think it was just a fluke.
What drug is illegal in the ocean
Sea weed
What is a blue whale’s favourite James Bond Film?
Licence to Krill.
My dad hates the ocean, but the other day he bought a boat.
He never could resist a good sail.
What did one tidepool say to the other tidepool?
Show me your mussels!
What does a mermaid wear to math class?
An algae-bra, naturally.
What does a dolphin say when he’s confused?
Can you please be more Pacific?
Have you heard about the restaurant that caters exclusively to dolphins?
It only has one customer, but at least it serves a porpoise.
My friend asked me how big the ocean is.
I said "can you be more Pacific?"
What did the tuna say to her overzealous partner?
I think we need to scale things back here.
Why are there fish at the bottom of the sea?
Because they dropped out of school.
I had a dream the ocean was filled with orange soda
It was a Fanta sea.
Where does a killer whale go for braces?
The orca-dontist.
I was trying to look at a picture of the ocean but kept having to reload the page, it finally worked after 5 attempts.
That was refreshing to sea.
I was going to tell a joke about the natural disaster in the Indian Ocean
But it was too Tsunami.
What’s a cetacean’s favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
Why didn’t the two algae ever have se*?
Because they had a planktonic relationship
What is the best way to communicate with a fish?
Drop it a line!
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
Why is the ocean so salty?
Because the land never waves back.
Go to BabaMail
