Where does a killer whale go for braces?
The orca-dontist.
I went fishing in the ocean the other day and caught one fish
but I think it was just a fluke.
Did you hear about the Spanish ocean?
Si.
What did the ocean say when asked if he wanted to be friends with the beach?
“Shore!”
What do baleen whales call a hook-up?
Netflix and krill.
What’s a cetacean’s favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
I can't believe I can't see the bottom of the ocean.
It's unfathomable.
What does the fish say when she disagrees with her husband?
I don’t quite sea it that way.
How did the shark plead in the murder case?
Not gill-ty.
I wanted make a joke about the ocean, but it's too deep
Australia announced that they have begun dumping sewage into the ocean
It’s now classified as an in-continent.
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Thanks for all the sediment.
How do you cut an ocean in half?
With a seasaw!
What does a mermaid wear to math class?
An algae-bra, naturally.
I was going to tell a joke about the natural disaster in the Indian Ocean
But it was too Tsunami.
Do you know what would happen when you throw a Finnish sailor into the ocean?
Helsinki.
What did the sarcastic otter say?
I think you’ve confused me with someone who builds a dam.
Where does seaweed look for a job?
In the kelp-wanted section.
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
What does a dolphin say when he’s confused?
Can you please be more Pacific?
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
Why did the fisherman suddenly redirect his boat?
Just for the halibut.
What did the Ocean say to the shore?
Nothing. It just waved.
Why didn’t the two algae ever have se*?
Because they had a planktonic relationship
Why are there fish at the bottom of the sea?
Because they dropped out of school.
Why is the ocean so salty?
Because the land never waves back.
What did the lobsterman say when his crate turned up empty?
It a-piers we have a problem.
Where do shellfish go to borrow money?
The prawn broker.
Why do freshwater fish cry so much?
They’re just a stream of emotions.
What did one tidepool say to the other tidepool?
Show me your mussels!
Why does the mermaid wear seashells?
Because she grew out of her B-shells.
Have you heard about the restaurant that caters exclusively to dolphins?
It only has one customer, but at least it serves a porpoise.
What do you call two bandits in a race on the ocean.
Piracy.
Why did the lobster blush?
Because the sea weed.
How do you split the ocean in half?
With a sea-saw.
What is a blue whale’s favourite James Bond Film?
Licence to Krill.
What do you call a big fish that makes you an offer you can’t refuse?
The Codfather.
I was trying to look at a picture of the ocean but kept having to reload the page, it finally worked after 5 attempts.
That was refreshing to sea.
What did the tuna say to her overzealous partner?
I think we need to scale things back here.
Why is the ocean always blue?
Because the shore never waves back.
Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years at C!
What drug is illegal in the ocean
Sea weed
Why are seabirds so lucky in love?
Because one good tern always deserves another.
What did the wise papa fish tell his son?
Keep your friends close and your anemones closer.
My dad hates the ocean, but the other day he bought a boat.
He never could resist a good sail.
What is the best way to communicate with a fish?
Drop it a line!
Why Did the Whale Cross the Ocean?
To get to the other tide.
What did the carp say to his crush?
Don’t play koi with me!
Did you hear about the red ship that collided with the blue ship?
All the sailors were marooned.
Did you hear about the lawyer who tried to sue a shark for biting all his limbs off?
He didn’t have a leg to stand on.
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