Two fish are swimming in a river, when one of them hits a concrete wall. He turns to the other and says: "Dam"
Why are small dried up river beds so cool? Because they're ex-stream.
Why did two fishes go to the riverbank? They wanted to withdraw their fins.
Where do fish keep their money? In river banks.
I was gonna make a river joke, but I don't think it's current.
Why are you bringing me to this mountain river after our couple therapy session?!
Our therapist said I need to valley date you.
You have to act quickly during a flood because it's an emergent sea.
I have a butcher friend in London. Last week he caught a huge sea creature in the river there and made it into sausage. It was the beast of Thames. It was the wurst of Thames.
Don't get tide-up in sorrows, you will only cry a river.
While walking down the plains of the river, I lost my footing and got hit on my head. Now my head is swimming.
The man got shocked when he got down in the river because the river current was too strong.
In what state is the Amazon River? It is in the liquid state.
What did the priest say at the flooding river?
God, dam it!
The river fish went to the library and asked if he can get a book. The librarian said: "You can start by-rowing it."
Why did the River go to the doctor? Her flow wouldn't stop.
I thought I was swimming in the river Thames, but apparently I made it all the way to France before I realized I'm in Seine.
Why did the chicken cross the river?
To get to the otter side
Why did the River need Jesus? It was dammed.
What's the fastest thing on the river bed?
A motor-pike and side-carp.
The river turned out to be a great party guy because he just went with the flow.
Why did the river refuse to join the sea? Because the sea was salty.
What is at the end of a rainbow?
The letter W.
I once dreamt of crossing a wide river...
But it ended up being just a ferry tale.
Where do fish wash? In a river basin.
The scientists decided to clean up the Thames because it had a dirty mouth.
I see fewer and fewer rainbow tie-dye t-shirts these days. It's a dying art.
What is the name of the car that passes through the narrow stream of the river? Fjord.
Diving into shallow water could lead to jumping to wrong conclusions.
Every time I passed a ring-shaped coral reef with a coral rim that encircles a lagoon, I had to pay a fee. It was atoll.
Rivers are so lazy they never get out of their beds.
Why didn't the hipster swim in the river? It was too mainstream.
Rivers are...
the original streaming service.
What did the sea say to the river? You can run but you can't tide.
What do you call an old snowman? A creek.
Did you know the Mississippi River is a girl?
If it was a guy it would be the misterssippi River.
As I am walking towards my classroom, I get to know that my miss-is-sippi-ng my glass of water.
I enjoy throwing coins in the river and watching them. I like studying my cash flow.
What's the difference between Amazon Prime and the Amazon River? The Amazon River actually has sails.
How much do you love rainbows? Just a skittle bit.
The dock keeps floating above the river because of the pier- pressure.
I'm debating whether I should cross the river on foot or use my rowboat...
It's row v. wade.
One time, while visiting a river town, my brother was hungry and I fed him freshly made stream buns.
Who carries out operations in a river? A sturgeon.
The ocean cut off all ties with the river, because the river turned out to be too shallow.
What did Sherlock Holmes say to Watson when he noticed sandstone deposits on the river bank? "It's sedimentary, my dear Watson."
The insane amount of rainfall in Poland did not lead the river to flood, all was in Oder.
I took a walk down by the river the other day and I heard two birds speaking Spanish...
Turns out they were Portu-Geese.
The reason lakes are bigger than rivers is because one has running water whereas the other water is merely standing.
The fisherman lost his new fishing hook in the river. He refused to accept it. He was in the Nile.
Last night the river was arrested. The river was accused of illegal streaming.
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