How do you know flowers are capable of kissing?
They have tulips.
Scientists have genetically modified a Venus Fly Trap to have the skin of a cactus
They say its bark is worse than its bite.
What did the grouchy mushroom say to the loud mushroom? - Put a cap on it.
Did you hear about the flower who never bloomed?
It was a bud omen.
Today isn’t the day to be making jokes about the weather.
It’s snow joke.
How do you know if there’s a snowman in your bed?
You wake up wet!
Why are coyotes howling in the night?
Because they can only see the cactuses in the day.
The only way the mushroom could think of decorating his house was with toadstools.
What did the flower do when she was challenged?
Rose to the occasion.
What do you call a human that's now a cactus?
A transplant.
I quit my job at the concrete plant.
My job was getting harder & harder.
What happened to the wooden car with a wooden engine and wheels? It wooden go at all.
Why do trees like to watch Star Trek? They really relate to the Captain’s log.
We all know that rooms are just empty spaces, and no one can even dream of making a delicacy out of them. The only room is the mushroom.
What would Jerry McGuire have said if he was a flower?
You had me at hydrangea.
During the contribution’s session, the mushroom family never gave a lot. They were just two spore.
What do you call a slow skier?
A slopepoke!
How much does a flower love their friends?
Bunches.
Where do birch trees keep their jewelry? In the river bank.
What does a triangle palm like to study in school? Trigonometree.
What is a birch’s favorite dinosaur? The Tree
Rex.
What did the Christmas tree tell his crush? I pine for you.
You can virtually stay in any room. The only one you can’t is the mush-room because it is reserved for fungi.
Did you hear about the lazy flower who finally got his act together?
He just needed a kick in the bud.
Why didn’t Guns N Roses turn up for the gig when it was snowing?
Axel Froze.
. How can you easily identify a dogwood tree? By listening to the bark.
What type of room do you eat? A mush room.
Why was it hard for police to catch the tree bandit? He had them stumped.
What did the flower say when he wanted a second chance?
I’ll grow on you.
What do you call a dinosaur who sat on a cactus?
A megalo-sore-ass.
Why did the dunce get hurt after raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.
What happens to romantic trees on Valentine’s Day? They get all sappy.
What do you see when an elephant hides behind a tree?
The trunks
What do you call a snowman with a six pack?
An abdominal snowman.
What did the beaver tell the tree? It has really been nice gnawing you.
What do you say to a flower after a breakup?
Get clover it.
Look Honey, a cactus!
I haven't seen that many pricks in one place since your family was in for Thanksgiving!
What did the snowman order at Wendy’s?
A Frosty.
What flowering plant is an amazing equestrian? The horse chestnut.
Why do trees make the worst enemies?
Because they are the best at throwing shade.
The fungi turned down seconds at dinner because he never had mushroom.
What types of stories do giant sequoias love to tell? Tall tales, of course.
What did the flower say when he saw his date?
I think you’re dandy, and I’m not lion!
What did the snowman order at the fast food restaurant?
An ice burger extra cheese.
What do you call it when you plant a tree at each corner of a house?
A fourest.
What is the tree’s least favorite month of the year? SepTIMBERRRR.
Why was the sapling crying to her mom? She said the big trees wouldn’t leaf her alone.
Where do American trees like to go for vacations in Canada? Montreeal.
What do Snowmen call their offspring?
Chill-dren.
How do you keep the snow from giving you cold feet?
Don’t go around BRRfooted!
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