What do you get when you plant a Donut?
A pastree.
What did the mushroom say after the car accident? Help I’m a truffle!
What was the worst crime in the tree kingdom? Tree-son.
What do you say when you want a kiss from a flower?
Plant one on me.
Why is it always quiet in the forest? Because all of the trees sleep like a dog.
What did the trees wear when they went to a pool party? Swimming trunks.
Why couldn’t the oak tree make friends? All of the other trees thought that he was a bit shady.
What did one cactus say to the other cactus ?
"Lookin sharp !"
What does a flower write on their valentine?
Aloe you vera much.
What did the Jedi tell the sacred tree? May the forest be with you.
What can you catch in the winter with your eyes closed?
A cold.
What sort of cakes do snowmen like?
The ones with thick icing!
Why did the Platanus occidentalis have to go to the doctor more than the other trees? Because it was always sycamore.
Getting my toy drone stuck in the tree isn’t the worst thing that happened to me today.
But it’s definitely up there.
Never go on a date with a cactus
They'll spike your drink
How do you get into the mush-room? Ring the porta-bella.
What do Snowmen call their offspring?
Chill-dren.
What did the mushroom request when booking his hotel? A shroom with a view, please!
Don’t ask me for any tree puns.
Acacia haven’t noticed I’m all out.
What side of the tree contains the most leaves? The outside, of course.
How does a penguin build a house?
Igloos it together.
If you live in an igloo made of snow, what’s the worst thing about global warming?
No privacy!
What did the snowman order at Wendy’s?
A Frosty.
What does a door to door flower salesman do?
Petal his wares.
Why are cedars so hard to get along with? They suffer from bigo-tree and ex-tree-mism.
We all know that rooms are just empty spaces, and no one can even dream of making a delicacy out of them. The only room is the mushroom.
Why are flowers so good at problem-solving?
They know how to nip things in the bud.
What did the flower tell his son before a big game?
I’m rooting for you.
Why do trees always get hired? They have the right qual-leaf-ications.
To everyone in the Christmas Tree industry
You all do a great job! Stand up and take a bough!
What happened when the snowgirl had a fight with the snowboy?
She gave him the cold shoulder.
What do you call a slow skier?
A slopepoke!
A team of mushrooms was playing basketball against a team of cabbages. The mushrooms won. Everyone cheered for the champignons.
Mushrooms always hate going to school. They feel inferior before the rest because they are always so spore-d.
What is a mountains favorite type of candy?
Snow caps.
What did the conifer say when he finally got alone with his crush? It’s just yew and me, baby.
Why did the frog lose his job on the mushroom farm? He stole the toads-tool.
What are the best mushrooms to have with a jacket potato? Button mushrooms!
Why did the mushroom need time off work? Because he was fried.
If your imagination hits peak high and you combine a toadstool and a suitcase, you won’t have mushroom for your vacation clothes.
What did the flower say after he told a joke?
I was just pollen your leg!
What did the rock say after it rolled into a tree? Nothing because rocks can’t talk.
A woman who gave birth in a tree was sent to jail
She was charged with treeson
What does a flower say when they’re surprised?
What in carnation!
What did the Christmas tree tell his crush? I pine for you.
How do you describe an acorn in one sentence? In a nutshell, it is an oak tree.
The plant was tired of being boring.
It has decided to turn over a new leaf.
Why was the dogwood always making bad choices? Because he kept barking up the wrong tree.
Why don’t trees travel in groups? Because two’s a company, but tree’s a crowd.
How does a bee travel to a tree? They get on the buzz.
Why are dogwood trees amazing pets? They have a great bark and a wooden bite.
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