What did the tree do when it found that the bank had closed? It starts a new branch.
How do you describe an acorn in one sentence? In a nutshell, it is an oak tree.
What did the tree tell the drill? You bore me.
What is it called when a tree has back problems?
ScoliOAKsis
What do snowmen wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
Why did the sapling go to the doctor’s office? He was feeling a little green.
What does a stick say when it falls down?
"Wood you help me up?"
What plant do both Spaniards and French agree is the best?
Seaweed.
What do you call a nice tree that does not have any teeth? Sweetgums.
What pickup line did the flower use on Tinder?
Are you a DAMNdelion?
What’s the scariest plant?
BamBoo.
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
Frost bite.
Where do saplings graduate from? Elementree school.
There’s two balloons in the desert. One says look out for that cactus!
The other goes What Cactussssss...
Why did the lettuce and the mushroom break up? The lettuce was pretty but the mushroom did not have much room for her in his life.
What did the mushroom say after the car accident? Help I’m a truffle!
Where do American trees like to go for vacations in Canada? Montreeal.
What did the Jedi tell the sacred tree? May the forest be with you.
What is the tree’s least favorite month of the year? SepTIMBERRRR.
Scientists have genetically modified a Venus Fly Trap to have the skin of a cactus
They say its bark is worse than its bite.
What did the water plant worker say when their facility flooded?
Dam.
What do you call a giant mushroom? Hu-fungus.
What did the rock say after it rolled into a tree? Nothing because rocks can’t talk.
What's the difference between a BMW and a Cactus?
Pricks are on the outside of Cactuses.
What does a flower do when they get caught in a lie?
Backpetal.
Why did the flower take her husband back after he cheated?
She rose above it.
If the sun shines while it’s snowing, what should you look for?
Snowbows.
Why was the sapling crying to her mom? She said the big trees wouldn’t leaf her alone.
What does a flower say when they’re surprised?
What in carnation!
Why won’t the mushroom buy a couch? - He prefers toadstools.
How does a bee travel to a tree? They get on the buzz.
When Mr. Mushroom saw Miss Mushroom, he didn’t hesitate to ask her out on a date because he had she was such a fungi-rl.
Whats a bad flower pick-up line?
Lets put our tulips together?
Where did the Adansonia tree go to get a quick trim? To the baobarber.
What flowering plant is an amazing equestrian? The horse chestnut.
What is it called when a snowman has a temper tantrum?
A meltdown!
I fernly beleaf my tree puns are qualitree, you can leaf me alone if you disagreen.
If a tree had a mouth, wood it bark?
What does the mushroom say to his lover? – “I have so mush-room in my heart for you, baby!”
What do you call a snowman party?
A snowball.
What can you catch in the winter with your eyes closed?
A cold.
Why did the Sugar Maple have to go to the dentist? It really needed a root canal.
How do trees get onto the internet? They just log on.
What do you call a dinosaur who sat on a cactus?
A megalo-sore-ass.
What is the hardest part about being a tree? You have so many limbs, but you still can’t walk.
How do you know you’re in love with a flower?
Not a daisy goes by where you don’t think of them.
Why are trees the largest plant? Because they are truly tree-mendous.
How would you scare a snowman?
Get a hairdryer!
What did the snowman eat?
Icebergs with chilli sauce.
How does a penguin build a house?
Igloos it together.
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