What does a flower do when they get caught in a lie?
Backpetal.
What do you call a snowman party?
A snowball.
What is bigger than a Christmas tree?
A Christmas four
Why are trees so silly? All of their puns arboring and acorny.
In the mushroom bus, one mushroom said to the other, "Please scoot over, there is not mush room."
Why do trees always get hired? They have the right qual-leaf-ications.
What are the best mushrooms to have with a jacket potato? Button mushrooms!
Did you hear about the loggers who stopped cutting down the forest? The trees really felt re-leafed.
Did you hear about the flower who never bloomed?
It was a bud omen.
What type of mushrooms can you put on a jacket? Button mushrooms.
Next time you’re feeling down, just remember: your plants are rooting for you. Literally!
What sort of ball doesn’t bounce?
A snowball!
What do you call a grandpa flower?
Poppy.
Why couldn’t the oak tree make friends? All of the other trees thought that he was a bit shady.
Why won’t the mushroom buy a couch? - He prefers toadstools.
Why was the evergreen so lonely in high school? She was always pining to become a part of the poplar kids.
What does the birch like to study in school? Chemistree.
Why did the lettuce and the mushroom break up? The lettuce was pretty but the mushroom did not have much room for her in his life.
Is it hard to count conifers? It’s as simple as one, two, tree!
During the contribution’s session, the mushroom family never gave a lot. They were just two spore.
What does a stick say when it falls down?
"Wood you help me up?"
Why do trees like to watch Star Trek? They really relate to the Captain’s log.
Whats a bad flower pick-up line?
Lets put our tulips together?
I am still trying to launch beef and cream out of a mushroom cannon. It is not stroganoff.
What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Frosted Flakes.
What do chic evergreens wear for cruelty-free fashion? Faux fir.
What did the mushroom’s sing when they won the closed-cup? - We are the champignons!
Why are trees such great drivers? They always take the shortest root.
The only way the mushroom could think of decorating his house was with toadstools.
What did the mushroom say after the car accident? Help I’m a truffle!
What is a birch’s favorite dinosaur? The Tree
Rex.
What did Sherlock Holmes say when he caught the Christmas tree bandit? It was elemen-tree, my dear Watt-son.
How did the pines and firs end their war? With a tree-ty.
Why are plants the best chefs?
They’re succulent.
What type of motorcycle do London Plane trees like to ride? Treeumph.
Why was the dogwood always making bad choices? Because he kept barking up the wrong tree.
What did the grouchy mushroom say to the loud mushroom? - Put a cap on it.
What tree is bought the most at the plant store?
The poplar tree
Why did the Platanus occidentalis have to go to the doctor more than the other trees? Because it was always sycamore.
There is always a first time to everything. For instance, when you take a mushroom either for lunch or dinner, you will be amazed at how magical it is.
So I cut down a tree using my vision today
It’s true, I SAW it with my own eyes.
How do trees get onto the internet? They just log on.
What do you call ten Arctic hares hopping backwards through the snow together?
A receding hare line.
Why do trees always hate taking tests? Because they keep getting stumped by the questions.
What do trees write on? Loose leaf paper.
Why did the Sugar Maple have to go to the dentist? It really needed a root canal.
Why do flowers always drive so fast?
They put the petal to the metal.
Today I helped father-in-law to fix his plants
it was very grounding.
Why was the pine tree always in trouble? It kept being knotty.
If you are preparing jacket potatoes, your choice vegetables should be button mushrooms.
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