What's the most important day in Egypt?
Mummy's Day.
What is the best job for a mummy during holidays? A gift wrapper.
What is the favourite food of the Egyptian god? It is the Ramen.
What did the thirsty mummy do?
They put on a thirst aid bandage.
What did one pyramid say to the other? Hey! Where's your mummy?
How did the mummy defeat Superman? He had Cryptonite.
Q: Why couldn't the Pharaoh sing?
A: He hurt his larSphinx
Q: Which pretty actress was an ancient Egyptian favorite?
A: Pharaoh Fawcett
What type of food do mummies like?
Chicken wraps.
Q: Why was the Pharaoh Khufu sent to jail?
A: He ran a pyramid scheme.
Why was Cleopatra so in love with Egypt's ruler?
Pharaohmones
What did pharaohs use to wipe?
Poo-pyrus
Q: What was Cleopatra's favorite type of flower?
A: Chrysantha-mummies.
I saw this new movie about a mummy's new bandages. It was called The Emperor's New Cloths.
Why did the pharaoh go to the dentist?
Egypt his tooth.
Q: How did the Pharaoh Hatshepsut know it was time to retire?
A: He saw the writing on the wall.
I once played chess with an Egyptian King...
...I was distracted for a moment, and when I turned around he was blatantly attempting to cheat. I told him that that wasn't very pharaoh.
Q: What was the most important holiday in ancient Egypt?
A: Mummy's Day.
Did you hear about the scary couple in prom this year? It was a mummy and his ghoul-friend.
De-coffin-ated coffee is the favourite coffee of the mummy.
What would the Egyptian doctor tell to the wife of the Egyptian Pharaoh? He said that she was going to become a mummy.
What does a mummy use when he needs to hide? Masking tape.
Q: What was the pharaoh's favorite football team?
A: The Mummy Dolphins
Q: What do trains do at Egyptian train yard gates?
A: Toot-and-come-in.
What did the Pharaoh tell the man who tried to sell him a pyramid? "Well, that's the last thing I need."
Q: What do you get when you cross an Egyptian pharaoh with a mechanic?
A: Toot and Car Man.
Why didn't the peasants attend the Egyptian king's open palace party?
The address was "2, Pharaoh Way"
Approximately how many Egyptians can be fitted inside a pyramid? A pharaoh mount.
Q: When is a Pharaoh like a piece of wood?
A: When he's a ruler.
Why wasn't the archaeologist interested in girls?
Because he only dated mummies.
Why does Egypt not celebrate Father's Day?
Because they're so full of mummies
What did the mummy order to eat when he went to a restaurant? A wrap.
Why didn't the mummy have any friends? Because he was too wrapped up in himself.
Q: What do you call a mummy who wins the lottery?
A: A lucky stiff
Q: What do you get when you cross a green mummy with a yellow mummy?
A: A golden moldy
How does the mother call the pharaoh son to the table?
Tutan, come on.
A lot of people don't like movies about mummies. I think they get a bad wrap.
After Jesus's trial was complete, he asked the Roman soldier closest to him what was going to happen next.
"I don't know. I'll keep you posted."
What do you call a Pharaoh who plays the trumpet? Tootin'khamun.
The mummy couldn't finish his Halloween candies. Because he was stuffed.
Who does a dead pharaoh talk to?
His mummy.
Unlike fairy tales, the stories of Egyptian mummies always goes from riches to rags.
How did Ozymandias became the greatest Pharaoh of Egypt?
He rammed everything that he sees
Q: How did the Pharaoh get to school?
A: In Anubis.
Why did the ancient Egyptians used to bury their Pharaohs in several layers of coffin? It was called multicasking.
Q: What brand of underwear do pharaohs wear?
A: Fruit of the Tomb.
Q: Why was Cleopatra worried about getting home from school?
A: She didn't want her mummy to see her report card.
Q: Why was young Tutankhamun home from school?
A: He caught a gold.
Where does a pharaoh use the bathroom?
A pee-ramid
Did you hear about the mummy who goes to university? His favorite subject is Cryptography.
Go to BabaMail
