Was Henry VI a ViKing?
How was the viking party?
Pretty Loki.
Where do Viking warrior scrabble champions go when they die?
Vowel-halla
Did you hear about the viking cannibal?
He had a Swede-tooth.
What did a viking said to the other after a dad joke?
Aesir what you did there.
Why was the viking boxer loved so much
He ragna"rocked" the house
Why did the Vikings sail to England in longboats?
It was too far to swim!
Why do vikings have barcodes on their ships?
Its so they can scan-de-navien
What did Dead Viking say to Voluptuous Valkyrie?
Valhallo there.
Why do companies all around the world fear Vikings?
Because of their skills in hacking
What did one Viking war paint say to the other?
Poly, you're a Thane.
Where do southern Viking descendants go after death?
Y'allhalla.
A viking adds symbols to an axe he has just made ...
" Oh no iv runed it"
What do you call a Viking cat call?
Valholla
What's a Vikings favourite dance?
The Loki cokey.
What do you call a Viking who's been bitten by a vampire?
Norseferatu.
My friends and I are starting a disco group.
We'll dress as a Viking, a Mongol, a Caribbean pirate, a Bedouin raider, and a Spanish conquistador.
We call ourselves: The Pillage People.
How do you communicate with the spirit of a Viking warrior?
With a Nor-Ouija board.
Where did the Viking buy his guitar?
Nordstrom's
What do you call a viking cemetary?
A grey fjord.
What stories did Vikings tell their children?
Norsery Rhymes
How can you tell if you're at a classy Viking restaurant?
They have Valhallet parking
Old Norse cuisine is simply not to my Viking.
The Vikings had an initiative tradition where a child had to participate in a raid to become a full man
... as they say, it takes a pillage to raise a child.
Did you hear about the Viking who was reincarnated?
He was Bjorn again.
What do you tell the nobles of Scandinavia whenever you're leaving their house?
Viking.
Why can't Vikings fans eat cereal? Because they choke before they ever reach the bowl.
Why were the Vikings such good sailors?
You can lead a Norse to water but you can't make him sink.
Why are Scandinavian women so hot?
The Vikings didn't bring back the ugly ones.
What do Vikings call the people that cut their hair?
Barberians.
Norwegian archeologists have uncovered the very first Viking parenting book.
The title, translated into modern language, is *It Takes a Pillage*.
What are the Vikings favorite drink?
Mini Sodas
What does vikings call english villages?
Chopping centers.
My girlfriend said if I don't stop my obsession with Viking culture she'll fight me to the death.
"Jokes on you," I said. "If I die in battle, I'll go straight to Valhalla."
Where does a Viking keep their baby?
In the Norsery."
What do you call a weary Viking conqueror?
Bluetooth low energy
How do Vikings get each other's attention?
They ValHolla!
What do you call a vegetarian Viking?
Norvegan.
What do you call a Swedish cycling group?
Viking Biking
How did Vikings send secret messages?
Norse code
What do you call a group of penniless Viking grave diggers?
The poor norsemen of the necropolis.
What was the Vikings favorite song while invading England ?
Heathen flow by Pearl Jam
One night, a Viking called Rudolph the red was looking out of his window when he suddenly said, "It's going to rain."
His wife asked, "How do you know?"
"Because Rudolph the red knows rain, dear."
Why did the Vikings not have high doorknobs?
Because of Loki.
Vikings weren't exactly the best at drinking contests.
They were quite MEADiocre.
What does a Muslim Viking say at the movie theater?
Valhalla Snackbar!
What is a Vikings favourite letter?
Well obviously it's the C!
What kind of car does a viking drive?
A fjord
There's this video game about an FBI psychologist hunting a Viking Angel of Death....
I believe it's named Valkyrie's Profile.
What is the most popular console with the vikings?
The axe-box
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