When many knights were being killed by guns and bombs, the medieval scientist discovered a weapon that would destroy all their enemies. It was known as the knightrogen bomb!
How did one become a medieval executioner?
You had to axe nicely.
Did you hear about the medieval kinghunter?
He excelled in throne weapons
I would say that life for the majority of people in the middle ages was rather peasant.
The medieval king was very excited when the engineer told him that he could get him a castle at very little price. Turns out, the engineer indeed built a castle but it was a bouncy one.
What do you call a gathering of Arthur's Knights?
A Sir conference
What do you call a medieval horse in the army
A knight-mare
It was quite dangerous for messengers back in the medieval era.
They often had to wear mail armor.
What do you call 3 knights in a relationship?
Polyarmory
What did Richard III say when someone asked to build a car park in Leicester?
"Over my dead body!"
Vincent Van Gogh met a knight during the latter part of his life, who inspired him to draw one of his most famous paintings - The Starry Knight.
What would be one of the worst crimes to commit if you were a sheep living in the medieval times?
Muttiny
What do you call a knight in a cannibal village? Canned food.
Who was King Arthur's alcoholic knight?
Sir Ohsis of the Liver
The castle and court of Camelot were famous for their knight-life.
Why was the king only a foot tall?
Because he was a ruler.
What was the name of the knight who made the round table of Sir Arthur perfect? He was a knight called Sir Cle.
For several days each month, some friends and I get together, play instruments and sing in a medieval style.
I guess you could call it my minstrel period.
How did they name those guys who wore shiny armor in medieval times?
They couldn't think of a name, so they decided to call it a knight.
What do you name a knight who has been able to persevere through all the barriers in his way? A Sir Vivor!
What is the name of the device that the king uses to control the moat around his castle? A remoat control.
Why is the Medieval period often called the Dark Ages?
Because there were so many knights.
What punishment do legs get in the medieval era?
decapita-shin
Why did the medieval Indian go to the doctor?
He was feeling a bit Sikh
What would be one of the worst crimes to commit if you were a sheep living in the medieval times?
Muttiny
Most of the knights of the round table of King Arthur were in their middle ages.
No one could measure their height in medieval kingdoms.
Only the Ruler could.
Who was the knight that was very secretive?
Sir Reptitious
Where does a Knights templar keep his valuables?
A deus vult
I googled 'lost medieval servant boy'
The result was 'This page cannot be found.'
What did Medieval postmen wear?
Chain mail.
If I lived in medieval times, I'd be a tavern guard.
I've always been known for my Inn-Security.
The knight fell very sick over the weekend. He had a running temperature and was feeling very nauseous. The doctor called it the Saturday Knight Fever.
Which cheese surrounds a medieval castle?
Moatzarella.
Where does King Arthur throw his stupid knights?
In the Dumbgeon.
I wouldn't trust medieval executioners in today's world.
They are prepared to kill people, simply to get a head.
Digging trenches during the middle ages was seen as a great honor because it showed someone's shovelry!
What do you call someone who used to build airplanes in medieval times? Aerosmith!
Why did the king order his new castle be built in the evening?
For the night knights!
What do you call a medieval spearman who is self employed?
A freelancer.
Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/8th!
What was the nickname for the knight who ruled the fort?
"Fortnite"
During the medieval time period, there weren't many extremely bad people. There were only mid-evil people during that age.
What do you call a knight who is afraid to fight?
Sir Render
My history teacher was talking about mythical medieval creatures
Personally, I think the lecture was starting to drag on
What did the borg say to the medieval peasant?
Resistance if feudal
Dance music can be traced back to medieval times when a farmer dropped some heavy beets.
What is the name of the knight that spreads all the rumors and news of the court and the king amongst the people? Sir Culate.
What can you find in both medieval English castles and American art museums?
Norman Rock Wells.
Knights have always used one type of lamp since medieval times. These lamps are now called Knight Lamps.
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