What does Santa often say to Mrs Claus? Come and look at the rain-dear.
What's a king's favorite kind of precipitation?
Hail!
Local weather reports state there won't be any rain for 1 year, but I drought it.
Why didn’t the light rain hit the target?
It just mist.
What is an evil dictator’s favorite type of weather?
A rain of terror.
There are so many puppies and kitties around the neighbourhood. Perhaps it is because it has been raining cats and dogs for hours.
Q: What falls but never hits the ground?
A: The temperature
What do you call a weather man that destroys dinosaurs?
A meteorologist
The queen’s favorite form of precipitation is the reign.
What did the ghost knights say to the cloud king?
Our souls will rain forever.
What do you call it when you boil a water buffalo?
A mist steak.
Why don’t Native Americans like to do rain dances in April anymore?
Because April showers bring Mayflowers.
When can 3 elephants stand under 1 umbrella and not get wet?
When it’s not raining.
Whenever someone wishes me to say "Happy Winter," it always leaves me cold.
Why did the woman go outdoors with her purse open?
Because she expected some change in the weather.
Q; What’s the difference between origami and grandpa passing wind?
A: One is the art of the fold, the other, the fart of the old.
Did you hear about those really bad storms that hit that boy scout camp over night?
They were in tents.
When does soil get rich?
When mother nature makes it rain.
When it was raining yesterday, I saw a man use ketchup and I got quite shocked. It is only later that I learnt he was taking advantage of the raining cats and hot dogs.
What do books wear on a wet and rainy day? Rain quotes.
The weather man said there won’t be any rain for 6 months, but I drought it.
What do you call dangerous precipitation?
A rain of terror!
It was so hot that the bee's perm had become extremely unmanageable, so she turned into a frizzbee.
Q: Why couldn’t the boy keep his documents open when he left a window open in winter?
A: Because it was too Win+D
What did the tornado say to the sports car?
Let's go for a spin!
Why do cows lie on each other in the rain?
To keep each udder dry.
There's a basic difference between weather and climate: you can't weather a tree, but you can definitely climate.
There was news of a snowstorm. It arrived white on time.
It started raining coins outside today.
I guess it’s just climate change.
It was hot today and when I went outside I saw there was a line of guys standing outside the hairdressers. I thought to myself, "Such a lovely day to have a barber queue".
There was a television channel ran by pets, the weather forecast was on and inclement weather was being predicted...
High chance of it raining cats and dogs, howling winds, and a possible purricane.
What do you call it when two people make a baby in fog?
A mist conception.
Q: What is a tornado’s favorite Elton John song?
A: Candle in the Wind!
What do you call an English rock band playing in the mist? Foghat.
When we were young, we had this myth that lightning bolts go all the way to cloud 9.
When is it raining money? Whenever there's 'change' in the weather.
You can't blame anyone if you fall in your driveway due to snowy weather...
Because that's your own asphalt.
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Accordion
Accordion who?
Accordion to the forecast, it's going to rain tonight.
I'm saving for a rainy day, so far I've collected a couple of raincoats, an anorak, and a dinghy.
The main difference between the weather and a horse is that one rains down while the other is reined up.
Wind turbines don’t talk about much. They just shoot the breeze.
I enjoy the cold weather
But only to a certain degree.
What’s the difference between a horse and wet weather?
One reigns up and the other rains down.
What did fog do to make the captain angry? He mist the boat.
What do you call a dinosaur that got stuck in the rain?
A driplodocus.
Q: What do you call a weatherman who farts while he pees?
A. Rain with a little wind and thunder.
What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxis.
Q: What do you call a row of 10 blondes standing ear to ear?
A: A wind tunnel.
Everyone said the wind was powerful. So, I went outside and was blown away.
Yesterday’s weather forecast predicted freezing rain. However, it turned out to be quite an ice day.