Did you hear about the football team that drafted a vending machine?
They really needed a quarter back!
The football won’t be the only thing spiked at this party.
Where can you find a golfer on a Saturday night?
Clubbing.
Why was the potato fired from his job at the football stadium?
He was a horrible commentater.
Why do volleyball players love to swim? They like diving in the deep and then floating in the shallow.
Why was the nice guy such a lousy baseball player?
Because he never got to home base.
Do you believe this? All soccer players, irrespective of their country of origin, have one goal.
The basic rule in the bowling game is to ensure you leave no pin standing.
Which athlete wrote the book, Jumping for Exercize?
Lee Ping.
Mary didn’t miss a first serve the entire match. It was not her fault she lost.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Eyesore.
Eyesore who?
Eyesore from my long run—can we take the elevator?
Which commandment do baseball players hate the most? Thou shall not steal.
Both tournament directors published the schedule at the same time. It was a draw.
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan.
How do recreational league baseball players stay so cool?
They sit among their fans.
Why was the basketball court so slippery?
Because all the players were dribbling on it.
My favorite sport is bowling cause I always strike out with girls.
The goal nine yards
A spectator at a baseball game wondered why the ball kept getting bigger and bigger. Then, it hit him.
What do you call a boat full of polite football players?
A good sportsman ship.
What does a bowler and a Thanksgiving guest have in common?
They both want a Turkey.
Which Nordique great has recurring ligament problems? Peter Spaz-knee!
I’ve been getting blitzed all game
How do you call football without shoes?
Socker.
Which cartoon character is the best at baseball?
Homer Simpson.
Why is it annoying to eat next to basketball players?
They dribble all the time.
The last thing I can remember was the yellow ball speeding toward me. I swung the racquet, and then things got fuzzy.
Why do you need six players to carry the volleyball to the game? No one can carry the volleyball and a whole team.
Which position does the son of Dracula play on the baseball team?
Bat boy.
The anti-vax basketball team lost every game this season
Apparently they never take any shots.
There is a specific type of cats who love to go bowling. They are known as alley cats.
Finally, the soccer ball decided to quit the team. The reason behind its move was that it was tied of being kicked around.
My friend was telling me about how a shark attacked her while she was diving
I told her, that bites.
What is a defensive football players favorite dessert?
Apple Turnover.
What do you get when you run behind a car?
Exhausted!
Why did the old man hate living next to the tennis courts?
He couldn't stand all the racket!
Why do referees always hurry to catch their next flight? Because it's "two
minutes 'fore boarding!"
Pick-up line: You might as well play be a tennis player, because I’m about to court you girl.
Why did the guy decide not to donate a dime to any charity raising funds for a marathon?
Because they just take the money and run.
We pass expectations, set the standards and kill the competition. This is definitely one of the best volleyball puns to use as your team’s motto.
This pool is impressive. Or should I say swim-pressive?
What happened when an icicle landed on the skier's head?
It knocked him out cold!
I may not be the biggest football fan, but I love tight ends.
Which classical Greek may have actually invented baseball?
Homer.
What is a golfer’s favorite dance move?
The Bogey.
I went deep sea diving and a mollusk wanted to give me a hug!
Damn cuddlefish.
Which trophy has the most glitz? The Lady Bling.
How are snow boards and vacuum cleaners alike?
Both have dirt bags on board.
My girlfriend told me she's breaking up with me because of my football obsession.
I told her she'll need to wait till the summer window if she wants a free transfer.
Would Gretzky have changed his name in order to play in Mexico?
Yes, The Great Juan did what it takes.
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