Why don't baseball players join unions?
They don't like to be called out on strike.
Scuba diving is a good hobby... if you wanna hit rock bottom.
My strategy is simple, knocking them down a pin at a time.
Which position does the son of Dracula play on the baseball team?
Bat boy.
There is one commonality between a magician and a soccer player. They both do hat tricks.
My football teammate asked me, “On a scale of 1-10, how do you rate our after-victory celebration?”
I gave him a high five.
Why can’t a car play football?
Because it only has one boot.
The perfect name for a pig that plays basketball is a ball hog.
What does the ski bum do when the chairlift line is too long?
He's gondola top of the mountain.
What is the 7th pin in bowling called? Mother-In-Law!
The calm before the score
The judge sentenced the basketball player to life imprisonment because he shot the ball.
Why did the volleyball player get thrown out of the party? He spiked the punch.
What did they give former Flyers left-winger Brian when he successfully
bulked up? Massive Propps.
If fish lived on land, in which country would they live? Finland.
Scrambled eggs are similar to a losing basketball team because both are beaten.
How are snow boards and vacuum cleaners alike?
Both have dirt bags on board.
Why don't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is
Why is learning to ski in France so difficult?
'Cause sometimes they won't Alp you.
What did the marathoner do after he won the race?
He decided to go into politics and run for office.
I’d like to throw away my old can, but my pusher friend here says he loves junk balls.
How are ladies' baseball teams and cupcakes alike?
Both are delicious and depend on a good batter.
What do runners do when they forget something?
They jog their memory!
Why do golfers hate cake?
Because they might get a slice.
There is a specific type of cats who love to go bowling. They are known as alley cats.
Why should somebody who's just out of rehab think twice before going on a skiing holiday?
Because it's a slippery slope.
What swims in the sea, carries a machine gun, and makes you an offer you can't refuse? The Codfather
Why do the ladies love baseball?
Because diamonds are a girl's best friend.
How are a volleyball player and a carpenter similar? They both love to hammer spikes.
The last thing I can remember was the yellow ball speeding toward me. I swung the racquet, and then things got fuzzy.
Our game is as tight as our spandex. This would be an awesome team motto.
What do you get if you cross a ski instructor and a vampire?
Frostbite.
Which hulking left-winger could body-slam The Giant? Dave Andre-chuck.
What stat do the Miami Dolphins lead every single year?
All Porpoise Yardage!
Which Finn is like a hotdog on the ice? Teemu Salami.
Basketball is the only sport where the basket is filled but never gets full.
What do a great hitter and a boxer have in common?
Both are serious sluggers.
What trophy does a stay-at-home defencemen win? The Snorris!
Native Americans used to have their own professional tennis tournaments, and provided free housing to players from other tribes. They called it the A Tee Pee Tour. (No disrespect to Native Americans!)
Footballers love one specific type of tea; penal-tea.
When the baseball team chose an owl masot, did they get a designated hooter?
I'm currently dating a famous soccer player. He's so loving and caring towards me.
He's a keeper.
You can forget about winning, princess. Because even Cinderella can’t get to this ball.
Why can't tomatoes ever beat lettuce in a race?
Because lettuce is always a head, and tomatoes have to ketchup!
What do fish and women have in common? They both stop shaking their tale after you catch them!
[Chips] This is what I call a chip shot.
Why don't orphans make good baseball players?
Because they don't know where home is.
Their soccer team and the US navy had one thing in common, they both spent over $50 million on a sub.
Why was the basketball court so slippery?
Because all the players were dribbling on it.
Why do gnomes like baseball? Gnome Runs.
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