When the defender was put in the box for spearing Jaromir Jagr, he
complained "but it was only a poke-Czech!"
Do you know how to dunk cookies? Ask a basketball chef.
How do you tell which is the Groom at a Polish wedding?
He's the one with the CLEAN bowling shirt
Did you hear about the football team that drafted a vending machine?
They really needed a quarter back!
When she saw all the madness around her, March said, “what’s all that bracket”.
Why did the volleyball player cross the street? There was a team member bar tending who could serve spiked drinks.
You shouldn't wear glasses when playing football...
They say it's a contact sport.
Fred is so condescending about my tennis strokes. I can’t take any more of his backhanded compliments.
The basketball player sat on the sideline and began sketching pictures of chickens. He was learning how to draw fowls.
Which trophy has the most glitz? The Lady Bling.
I like my matches like my tennis balls: Pressureless.
What do baseball players eat their backyard BBQ on?
Home plates.
Which position does the son of Dracula play on the baseball team?
Bat boy.
Why did the volleyball players line up from shortest to tallest? The coach wanted the team to switch from a 5-1 line up to a 6-2.
Why did the kicker finally decide to marry his high school sweetheart?
She was a fair catch!
After the Moroccan scored a Hat-trick, the players gathered for the fez-off.
Bowlers pay a lot of money to play. This is because it is a bum per lane.
A spectator at a baseball game wondered why the ball kept getting bigger and bigger. Then, it hit him.
[Beer] This is my number one draft pick.
"What are your thoughts on diving?"
"Well, I guess it's descent as a hobby."
Birds too love cheering on their soccer teams. They egg them on.
Why do gnomes like baseball? Gnome Runs.
I hate scuba diving.
It was the lowest moment of my life.
Volleyball is air affair. This would be a good motto for your team.
The chicken got sent off in the middle of the match because of their persistent fowl play.
What do you call a Spanish football player with no legs?
Gracias.
Why should somebody who's just out of rehab think twice before going on a skiing holiday?
Because it's a slippery slope.
Basketball is the only sport where the basket is filled but never gets full.
Who directs all of the movies about volleyball injuries? Spike Lee.
There is one commonality between a magician and a soccer player. They both do hat tricks.
Why was the baseball player so good at writing advertising jingles?
Because they're so catchy.
Why were the volleyball players always tying in tic tac toe? Each time one of them sets an X, the other player just says O.
Why do the blondes prefer to have se* instead of bowling?
The balls are lighter, and you don't have to change shoes.
Why was the potato fired from his job at the football stadium?
He was a horrible commentater.
What did the mitt say to the baseball?
Hey baby, you're quite a catch.
Will the Red Wings be able to replace their venerable captain Steve? No, because
when it comes to hockey smarts there is no Yzer man.
Why did the football referee have trouble measuring the first down?
Someone was yanking his chain!
What did the football player say to his Chinese son
Go Long!
The team’s star basketball player decided to remain at home the entire weekend. He didn’t want to be called out for travelling.
Why did the old man hate living next to the tennis courts?
He couldn't stand all the racket!
What do you get if cross a baseball player and a monster?
A double header.
When I got my first job at the bowling alley, I was only tenpin.
In later years was the Great One in decline? Yes he was on the Wayne.
We’re trying to pool off the party of the summer.
Jack has a large neck so he decided to wear a bowtie to his wedding. Otherwise, he’d end up with a tiebreak.
The only time a basketball team can chase a baseball team is five after nine.
What is a bird that flies over a football field called?
A fieldgull.
What do you get when you run behind a car?
Exhausted!
Have you ever played quiet tennis?
It's just like regular tennis but without the racket.
The calm before the score
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