If Hamlet was alive now, he would have only worn t-shirts saying 2B or not 2B!
Where does a Knights templar keep his valuables?
A deus vult
What was that knight's name who would always go around and call other knights by their last names? Sir Name.
What do you call a knight who is afraid to fight?
Sir Render
For the last two weeks my kids have been building a medieval blanket fort every evening to sleep in. Many nights they also stayed up past their bedtime playing fortnight under its protective cover.
It was a night knight fort for Fortnight for a fortnight.
Santa hit a dragon and killed it whilst flying over medieval England...
... guess you could say he sleighed it
These days, knights love to watch movies, and their favorite genre is the horror and the action genre. Also, I am pretty sure that their favorite movie is 'Knight Of The Living Dead.'
I like my wine like I like my medieval cities.
Fortified.
I googled 'lost medieval servant boy'
The result was 'This page cannot be found.'
What did Richard III say when someone asked to build a car park in Leicester?
"Over my dead body!"
What is the name of that knight who is very fond of the sea and spends most of his time at sea beaches? We call him Sir Fer.
What is a knight who has traveled all across the earth with a ship known as? He is known as Sir Cumnavigator.
I went to a dad-joke competition at Medieval Times last weekend..
They called it the Game of Groans.
What were middle-aged parents called in medieval times? Middle-aged parents.
What do you call a knight who just wants to fight with an opponent on level grounds? He is called Sir Face!
Did you know that back in medieval times, soldiers would sleep with lanterns next to them so they could see if something happened.
They were called "Knight Lights"
When medieval armies went off to war...
were they playing for keeps?
If you go to Medieval Times and watch the jousts, there is a sir charge.
What do you ask a medieval crustacean when you want them to feel the music?
Art thou feeling it now Mr. Krabs?
King Arthur had a knight in charge of determining property boundaries.
Sir Veyor
What did the borg say to the medieval peasant?
Resistance if feudal
What is the name of the device that the king uses to control the moat around his castle? A remoat control.
If I lived in medieval times, I'd be a tavern guard.
I've always been known for my Inn-Security.
Which one of King Arthur's knights named the Round Table?
Sir Cumference
I killed all the knights in the Iron Keep, except one,
He was Allone
What did the king say when he heard that the peasants were revolting? He said he agrees because they never bathe and always stink.
Who was King Arthur's alcoholic knight?
Sir Ohsis of the Liver
Medieval cures...
Were leeches on society
Why was the knight fighting the tournament with a sword made from cheddar cheese? Because the cheese was extra sharp!
What do you call a knight who wants to overthrow the King?
Sir Plant.
Why couldn't Vivaldi play medieval music?
Because his violin was Baroque
Why did the medieval Indian go to the doctor?
He was feeling a bit Sikh
How did explorers hide their treasures in the medieval ages? By dragon them to a safe location.
A great knight became all discombobulated and lost his weapons...
He was all out of swords.
The castle and court of Camelot were famous for their knight-life.
Why was the king only a foot tall?
Because he was a ruler.
Which cheese surrounds a medieval castle?
Moatzarella.
What is the name of the knight that spreads all the rumors and news of the court and the king amongst the people? Sir Culate.
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