What was that knight's name who would always go around and call other knights by their last names? Sir Name.
When medieval armies went off to war...
were they playing for keeps?
My sister once took a knight as a dance partner to her high-school party because it was a prom knight.
What do you call a medieval horse in the army
A knight-mare
Why did Arthur have a round table?
So nobody could corner him!
What do you call a Medieval knight who's always sure of himself?
Sir Tainly.
Why didn't the medieval farmers harvest flowers to make tea?
It would have been an exercise in feudal-lily-tea.
Why were medieval people from Mexico such good engineers? This is because they learned in Aztech!
What was the nickname for the knight who ruled the fort?
"Fortnite"
Who was King Arthur's alcoholic knight?
Sir Ohsis of the Liver
What was the favorite pass time of peasants from the medieval time period? They absolutely love to go serfing!
Did you know knights are known for wearing dishware?
Thats why they call it plate armor.
What did King Arthur call his sneakiest knight?
Sir Valence.
What did the bone mage use to rob medieval homes?
A skeleton key
What do you call a Korean knight who is looking for his lost belongings? He goes by the name Sir Ching!
My brother was reading a book about a medieval castle that always had its drawbridge up. Unfortunately, he couldn't really get into the book!
Lance is an uncommon name nowadays but in medieval times...
people were called Lance a lot.
What do you think is the name of the knight who unexpectedly turned up at the battle? His name is Sir Prize.
When were Medieval armies too tired to fight?
When they had a lot of sleepless knights!
Medieval Kings and Queens were afraid of the rain in the middle ages because the rain would storm the castle.
During the medieval time period, there weren't many extremely bad people. There were only mid-evil people during that age.
The medieval king was very excited when the engineer told him that he could get him a castle at very little price. Turns out, the engineer indeed built a castle but it was a bouncy one.
Why did the medieval Indian go to the doctor?
He was feeling a bit Sikh
What was the name of the knight who made the round table of Sir Arthur perfect? He was a knight called Sir Cle.
What would be one of the worst crimes to commit if you were a sheep living in the medieval times?
Muttiny
What do you call a candle in armor?
A knight light
My history teacher was talking about mythical medieval creatures
Personally, I think the lecture was starting to drag on
Last Christmas, I got my sister a build-it-yourself medieval fort. She wasn't very happy with it, but my mother reprimanded her by saying that it isn't the gift, but the fort that counts!
What punishment do legs get in the medieval era?
decapita-shin
If Hamlet was alive now, he would have only worn t-shirts saying 2B or not 2B!
What did the borg say to the medieval peasant?
Resistance if feudal
Did you hear about the medieval siege where the attackers ran out of ammunition? So, they loaded a severed peasant's head onto a trebuchet and fired it. By sheer luck, it hit the Duke's son and knocked him off the battlefield.
Yeah, apparently it was the first-ever serf face to heir missile.
How can you tell a sword is a knights favorite weapon?
He doesn't use a lance a lot.
Did you know that back in medieval times, soldiers would sleep with lanterns next to them so they could see if something happened.
They were called "Knight Lights"
What do you ask a medieval crustacean when you want them to feel the music?
Art thou feeling it now Mr. Krabs?
The knight fell very sick over the weekend. He had a running temperature and was feeling very nauseous. The doctor called it the Saturday Knight Fever.
The medieval queen was unhappy when she saw that it was pouring outside. She sighed to herself, "This could be another reigny day."
Why was the medieval knight polishing his dress before going for the Queens's dinner party? Because he wanted to have a night in shining armor!
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