It’s raining cats and dogs outside.
I think I just stepped in a poodle.
What does a tornado wear under his clothes? Thunderwear!
When is Monday coming?
MonSoon!
What is the difference between a wet day and a lion with a toothache? A wet day is pouring with rain, the other is roaring with pain.
Q: Why couldn’t the boy keep his documents open when he left a window open in winter?
A: Because it was too Win+D
When moving a piece of furniture at the weather station, you'll be needing four casters.
What always goes up whenever the rain comes down? An umbrella.
Q: What do you call a freezing bird?
A: Brrrrrrrrrdddd
What did one raindrop say to the other? Two's company, three's a cloud.
What happened when it started raining coins?
It knocked some sense (cents) into the world.
What do you call a storm that doesn't come to fruition?
A mist opportunity!
Q: Why did the tornado take a break?
A: Because it ran out of wind!
Thunderstorms are shrewd investors. They put their money in a combination of frozen and liquid assets.
Where does fog go to the bathroom?
Anywhere it wants.
What do you call dangerous precipitation?
A rain of terror!
A bunch of chill-dren from the neighborhood played all afternoon in the snow.
Had a great weekend. Won the annual weather forecaster's championships!
I beat the raining champion.
What happens before it rains candy? It sprinkles.
This very fair weather actually makes me feel like a feather!
Does all this rain make you want an ark?
I Noah guy.
The queen’s favorite form of precipitation is the reign.
Q: What did Julius Caesar’s pet windmill say?
A: I came, I spun, I conquered.
Why did the cloud stay at home? It was feeling under the weather.
Many people seem to believe that warm water droplets get cooled fast and form fog. It's a mist-conception. Someone should de-mist-ify it.
My glasses may be fogged up, but don’t worry I’ll be fine.
I’m optimistic!
With the kind of weather, it was almost certain that the bride-to-be would get a hoarse throat as she walked through the rain into her bridal shower.
What do you call a month’s worth of rain?
England.
What do you call it when you boil a water buffalo?
A mist steak.
I over boiled some venison broth earlier.
It was deerly mist.
Everyone said the wind was powerful. So, I went outside and was blown away.
With the nice warm weather last weekend, a neighbor was enthusiastically diggin' in the dirt planting his garden!
He was so excited about it, he wet his plants.
What did fog do to make the captain angry? He mist the boat.
How does one raindrop ask another out? Water you doing tonight?
Why do cows lie on each other in the rain?
To keep each udder dry.
Nowadays, people drought the accuracy of weather men because the climatic patterns are so unpredictable.
I tried playing baseball in the fog today.
It was a bit hit and mist.
The weather man said there won’t be any rain for 6 months, but I drought it.
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Accordion
Accordion who?
Accordion to the forecast, it's going to rain tonight.
Because it was so foggy at my father’s funeral, he was buried in the wrong plot.
It was a grave mist-stake.
Four types of weather were having a race. Sunny won gold, cloudy got silver, snowy picked up a bronze, and rainy won a precipitation award.
Knock Knock?
Who's there?
Hurricane
Hurricane who?
Hurry! Cane you jog away from the storm?
The only way bees can fly right through the rain is when they have their yellow jackets on.
The wind had such a great time. You could say it had a blast.
Q: What is a tornado’s favorite game?
A: Twister
Our weather bureau is actually an umbrella organization.
A good friend of mine fell into a vaporiser and died.
She is sadly mist.
Why do you never see owls being affectionate in the rain? It's too wet to woo.
What type of pants do rain clouds wear? Thunderwear.
It was hot today and when I went outside I saw there was a line of guys standing outside the hairdressers. I thought to myself, "Such a lovely day to have a barber queue".
What’s a bigamist?
It’s what Italians call a thick fog.
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