Why did the Viking buy an old boat?
He couldn't a fjord a new one.
Vikings aren't afraid of death.
They know they'll be Bjorn again.
Vikings joke
Why do West Virginia residences love the Vikings?
They catch theilens from their cousins.
Why did the Vikings sail to England in longboats?
It was too far to swim!
Wanna hear a joke about Vikings?
Never mind, there's Norway you'd laugh at it.
What do Vikings call the people that cut their hair?
Barberians.
Why was the viking boxer loved so much
He ragna"rocked" the house
Why did the Vikings not have high doorknobs?
Because of Loki.
Old Norse cuisine is simply not to my Viking.
The Vikings had an initiative tradition where a child had to participate in a raid to become a full man.
As they say, it takes a pillage to raise a child.
How did Vikings send secret messages?
Norse code
A man goes into a Chinese restaurant and sees people dressed like vikings
"Excuse me, ladies and gentleman. I am a well traveled man and the atmosphere of my excursions must be perfect. I must kindly ask you to leave."
A big, muscular man dressed in Viking armor walked up to the man and said
"Norway"
What do you call a Viking cat call?
Valholla
What do you call a vegetarian Viking?
Norvegan.
What do you call a viking who is attracted to both genders?
Biking
What do you call a Viking soldier's trusty steed?
A horse in the force of the Norse, of course.
It might take a village to raise a child...
but it only takes a viking to raze a village.
My girlfriend said if I don't stop my obsession with Viking culture she'll fight me to the death.
"Jokes on you," I said. "If I die in battle, I'll go straight to Valhalla."
What stories did Vikings tell their children?
Norsery Rhymes
Who succeeded the Vikings?
The Z-kings
What does a Muslim Viking say at the movie theater?
Valhalla Snackbar!
What did one Viking war paint say to the other?
Poly, you're a Thane.
What was the Vikings favorite song while invading England ?
Heathen flow by Pearl Jam
What do you call a Viking who is really good at basketball?
a Vallhalla Balla.
When a ship or Vikings suddenly vanishes
There's a disturbance in the Norse
What is a Vikings favourite letter?
Well obviously it's the C!
What do you call a weary Viking conqueror?
Bluetooth low energy
One night, a Viking called Rudolph the red was looking out of his window when he suddenly said, "It's going to rain."
His wife asked, "How do you know?"
"Because Rudolph the red knows rain, dear."
Did you hear about the viking cannibal?
He had a Swede-tooth.
What kind of car does a viking drive?
A fjord
What do you call a Swedish cycling group?
Viking Biking
Was Henry VI a ViKing?
What do you tell the nobles of Scandinavia whenever you're leaving their house?
Viking.
What's the difference between a Viking and that one Bond movie where he's in space?
One's *Moonraker*, the other's a rune maker.
Did you hear about the Viking who was reincarnated?
He was Bjorn again.
Why can't Vikings fans eat cereal? Because they choke before they ever reach the bowl.
Don't send our invitations to a viking themed wedding until the date is set in stone
Or they'll be runed
My friends and I are starting a disco group.
We'll dress as a Viking, a Mongol, a Caribbean pirate, a Bedouin raider, and a Spanish conquistador.
We call ourselves: The Pillage People.
Why were the Vikings such good sailors?
You can lead a Norse to water but you can't make him sink.
Where do Vikings go when they get old?
The Norsing home.
What is a Viking's favorite music?
Ragnarock.
What do you call a viking cemetary?
A grey fjord.
A viking adds symbols to an axe he has just made ...
" Oh no iv runed it"
Why are Scandinavian women so hot?
The Vikings didn't bring back the ugly ones.
When the Vikings discovered America, what did they name it?
Norse America.
What do you call a Viking who's been bitten by a vampire?
Norseferatu.
Where do Viking warrior scrabble champions go when they die?
Vowel-halla
Roman soldiers are trained.
But Vikings are Bjorn.
How do you communicate with the spirit of a Viking warrior?
With a Nor-Ouija board.
What is the most popular console with the vikings?
The axe-box
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