Why did the Vikings not have high doorknobs?
Because of Loki.
Where do Viking warrior scrabble champions go when they die?
Vowel-halla
A viking adds symbols to an axe he has just made ...
" Oh no iv runed it"
How do Vikings get each other's attention?
They ValHolla!
What do you call a viking cemetary?
A grey fjord.
What do you call a Viking soldier's trusty steed?
A horse in the force of the Norse, of course.
What do you call a group of penniless Viking grave diggers?
The poor norsemen of the necropolis.
How do you communicate with the spirit of a Viking warrior?
With a Nor-Ouija board.
Why can't Vikings fans eat cereal? Because they choke before they ever reach the bowl.
How does a Viking show the amount of raiding and pillaging that they do at the same time?
They use a Sven Diagram.
Did you hear about the viking who hit his thumb with a hammer and bit his tongue?
It was Thor.
Why do vikings have barcodes on their ships?
Its so they can scan-de-navien
Where do southern Viking descendants go after death?
Y'allhalla.
What are the Vikings favorite drink?
Mini Sodas
What do you call a Swedish cycling group?
Viking Biking
How can you tell if you're at a classy Viking restaurant?
They have Valhallet parking
Wanna hear a joke about Vikings?
Never mind, there's Norway you'd laugh at it.
Why are Scandinavian women so hot?
The Vikings didn't bring back the ugly ones.
Why do companies all around the world fear Vikings?
Because of their skills in hacking
Why was the viking boxer loved so much
He ragna"rocked" the house
When a ship or Vikings suddenly vanishes
There's a disturbance in the Norse
Why were the Vikings such good sailors?
You can lead a Norse to water but you can't make him sink.
How was the viking party?
Pretty Loki.
Why did the teacher use the evolution of Thor in viking mythology to teach both literature and Northern European history in her class?
She wanted to demonstrate using a Meta-Thor.
Old Norse cuisine is simply not to my Viking.
The Vikings had an initiative tradition where a child had to participate in a raid to become a full man.
As they say, it takes a pillage to raise a child.
There's this video game about an FBI psychologist hunting a Viking Angel of Death....
I believe it's named Valkyrie's Profile.
What did the Viking chieftain say when asked about his motivation?
"I'm in it for the longhall."
Who succeeded the Vikings?
The Z-kings
What do you tell the nobles of Scandinavia whenever you're leaving their house?
Viking.
What do you call a weary Viking conqueror?
Bluetooth low energy
What do you call a Viking cat call?
Valholla
What stories did Vikings tell their children?
Norsery Rhymes
Where do Vikings go when they get old?
The Norsing home.
Where does a Viking keep their baby?
In the Norsery."
What do you call a vegetarian Viking?
Norvegan.
What was the Vikings favorite song while invading England ?
Heathen flow by Pearl Jam
What is a Vikings favourite letter?
Well obviously it's the C!
A man goes into a Chinese restaurant and sees people dressed like vikings
"Excuse me, ladies and gentleman. I am a well traveled man and the atmosphere of my excursions must be perfect. I must kindly ask you to leave."
A big, muscular man dressed in Viking armor walked up to the man and said
"Norway"
What is the most popular console with the vikings?
The axe-box
What did Dead Viking say to Voluptuous Valkyrie?
Valhallo there.
Did you hear about the Viking who was reincarnated?
He was Bjorn again.
What did the Viking boss say to his band of misbehaving marauders?
It's either my way or Norway!
Was Henry VI a ViKing?
Vikings aren't afraid of death.
They know they'll be Bjorn again.
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